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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Why can't comedians do "to be continued" shows?
(a) They would have to hire the same place out again
(b) People would not come back
(c) The joke would not make sense
(d) People would be angry

2. What does Seinfeld say people like to recommend to each other?
(a) Dentists
(b) Doctors
(c) Lawyers
(d) Musicians

3. What does Seinfeld think that people who try, but fail, to commit suicide should do?
(a) Try again
(b) Divorce
(c) Come to his show
(d) Listen to happier music

4. What does Seinfeld hate the clerk doing when he goes shopping?
(a) Telling him he has made a good choice
(b) Verifying his credit card
(c) Asking him if he is Jerry Seinfeld
(d) Telling him one of his jokes

5. What does Seinfeld say he thinks about a lot?
(a) Jail
(b) Stealing
(c) Stranger women
(d) Marriage

6. What did Seinfeld's teachers write on his test papers?
(a) Just passed
(b) Not to standard
(c) Vague
(d) Good try

7. What seafood does Seinfeld think it is cruel to eat?
(a) Oysters
(b) Lobster
(c) Carp
(d) Crab

8. What did Seinfeld's mother do to the food to get him to eat?
(a) Put sugar on it
(b) Liquidise it
(c) Disguise it
(d) Make it into a face

9. Which of the following things did Seinfeld's parents fight over in the car?
(a) If the seats were leather
(b) If they needed a new car
(c) The color of the car
(d) How much gas

10. Who do women carry photographs of?
(a) Their lovers
(b) Their family members
(c) Their children
(d) Everyone they have ever met

11. What kind of knives does Seinfeld say TV encouraged him to buy?
(a) Rotor knives
(b) Jaksu knives
(c) Ginsu knives
(d) Quang knives

12. How do people know they are getting older?
(a) When they can't blow out a candle
(b) When they find the fish tank interesting
(c) When they become hunchbacked
(d) When they have to take their teeth out to eat

13. What does Seinfeld think all the snakes are?
(a) Dead
(b) Evil
(c) Ugly
(d) Beautiful

14. What is the title of the second section?
(a) Criminal Life
(b) My Money's Not Working
(c) Super Sein
(d) Media Mezzo

15. What state do Seinfeld's parents live in?
(a) Washington
(b) Florida
(c) Mississippi
(d) New York

Short Answer Questions

1. Who thinks their audience is dumb?

2. Why does Seinfeld not want his questions about Superman answered?

3. What job does Seinfeld think is the best in law enforcement?

4. Who is Seinfeld's favorite Superman?

5. What does Seinfeld think it is fun to do when you are a policeman?

(see the answer keys)

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