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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What newspapers does Seinfeld particularly dislike?
(a) The tabloid newspapers
(b) The Sunday newspapers
(c) The weekday newspapers
(d) The local newspapers

2. What do policemen have to give people before they arrest them?
(a) The Bloomer
(b) The Oracle
(c) The Yama
(d) The Miranda

3. What does Seinfeld say is worse than paying your taxes?
(a) Hiring an accountant
(b) Doing your taxes
(c) Not paying taxes
(d) Nothing

4. What does Seinfeld say he has never had?
(a) A Budweiser
(b) A real job
(c) A long term relationship
(d) A Long Island Ice Tea

5. What kind of animal did Seinfeld have as a pet?
(a) A mouse
(b) A cat
(c) A dog
(d) A parakeet

6. What kind of security guards does Seinfeld talk about?
(a) Bank security guards
(b) Celebrity security guards
(c) Museum security guards
(d) Supermarket security guards

7. What kind of knives does Seinfeld say TV encouraged him to buy?
(a) Quang knives
(b) Jaksu knives
(c) Ginsu knives
(d) Rotor knives

8. What job does Seinfeld think is the best in law enforcement?
(a) The camera guy
(b) The chalk outline guy
(c) The fingerprint guy
(d) The artist guy

9. What city does Seinfeld say is entertaining?
(a) Los Angeles
(b) Las Vegas
(c) San Francisco
(d) New York

10. What does Seinfeld think is the worst thing about television?
(a) It is too nostalgic
(b) The shows are pointless
(c) It makes him want to do nothing
(d) People are doing better than he is

11. Where did Seinfeld's parents use to drag him to as a kid?
(a) Antique fairs
(b) Car fairs
(c) Historical sites
(d) Church

12. Who does Seinfeld think it would be uncomfortable saying hello to everyday?
(a) Your children
(b) Your wife
(c) Your parents
(d) Office co-workers

13. What seafood does Seinfeld think it is cruel to eat?
(a) Lobster
(b) Carp
(c) Crab
(d) Oysters

14. What job does Seinfeld think is the toughest?
(a) Food tasting
(b) Unemployment
(c) Stand up
(d) Construction work

15. What does Seinfeld think it is fun to do when you are a policeman?
(a) Interviewing people
(b) Giving people tickets
(c) Handcuffing people
(d) Telling people what to do

Short Answer Questions

1. Who does Seinfeld say stands very high?

2. What does Seinfeld think it must be awful to be called all the time?

3. What does Seinfeld call footballers?

4. What does Seinfeld think is the funniest part of a lawyer's job?

5. What did Seinfeld's teachers write on his test papers?

(see the answer keys)

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