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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What does Seinfeld say he was afraid to touch in his parents' house?
(a) The silver cutlery
(b) The bronze statues
(c) The Grandfather clock
(d) The thermometer

2. What does Seinfeld's unemployed friend have to work hard at doing?
(a) Keeping his benefits
(b) Finding something to do
(c) Waking up in the morning
(d) Feeling happy

3. What did Seinfeld's teachers write on his test papers?
(a) Vague
(b) Good try
(c) Just passed
(d) Not to standard

4. What type of place does Seinfeld find too strict?
(a) Ski resorts
(b) Courthouses
(c) Health clubs
(d) Hotels

5. What member of the orchestra does Seinfeld wonder about?
(a) The bassist
(b) The violinist
(c) The celloist
(d) The conductor

6. What does Seinfeld say people like to recommend to each other?
(a) Dentists
(b) Musicians
(c) Doctors
(d) Lawyers

7. What did Seinfeld's parakeet use to fly into?
(a) Windows
(b) Walls
(c) Doors
(d) Mirrors

8. What does Seinfeld think people do too much of in the movies?
(a) Shush
(b) Cough
(c) Laugh
(d) Talk

9. Why does Seinfeld think his parents live in Florida?
(a) It is near the doctors
(b) They like it
(c) They are old
(d) It is easy

10. Why does Seinfeld not want his questions about Superman answered?
(a) There are better things to do
(b) He wants to keep enjoying it
(c) He wants to leave it a mystery
(d) He thinks he will be disappointed

11. What does Seinfeld say he thinks about a lot?
(a) Jail
(b) Marriage
(c) Stealing
(d) Stranger women

12. What part of the zoo does Seinfeld talk about?
(a) The bird house
(b) The snake house
(c) The lion's den
(d) The monkey house

13. What seafood does Seinfeld think it is cruel to eat?
(a) Crab
(b) Lobster
(c) Carp
(d) Oysters

14. What superhero is Seinfeld a big fan of?
(a) Hellboy
(b) Superman
(c) Batman
(d) Captain America

15. What does Seinfeld think it must be awful to be called all the time?
(a) A writer
(b) A freak
(c) A lion tamer
(d) A clown

Short Answer Questions

1. What women's sport does Seinfeld say he likes?

2. What does Seinfeld think is the funniest part of a lawyer's job?

3. What does Seinfeld think that people who try, but fail, to commit suicide should do?

4. What does Seinfeld think all the snakes are?

5. Where does Seinfeld think is a scary place to work?

(see the answer keys)

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