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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Why does Seinfeld find ambulance windshield stickers amusing?
(a) They are misspelled
(b) They confuse drivers
(c) They shine in the dark
(d) They are written backwards

2. What does Seinfeld say he is not scared of?
(a) Flying
(b) Driving
(c) Walking
(d) Running

3. What does Seinfeld talk about a woman doing to her legs?
(a) Slapping
(b) Shaving
(c) Tanning
(d) Waxing

4. What is Seinfeld uncertain about doing during sex?
(a) Laughing
(b) Coughing
(c) Yawning
(d) Talking

5. What can a woman do to a man?
(a) Suffocate him
(b) Take away his freedom
(c) Paralyze him
(d) Cook for him

6. Who does Seinfeld ask to get their priorities straight on the plane?
(a) The flight attendants
(b) The drunk passengers
(c) The noisy children
(d) The pilot

7. Why does Seinfeld believe people invented the answering machine?
(a) People always need to say something
(b) People were bored
(c) People have nothing to say to each other
(d) People hate to miss out

8. What does Seinfeld's hair always say in the morning when he wakes up in a strange bed?
(a) Relieved
(b) Panicked
(c) Relaxed
(d) Tired

9. What is the second section of this chapter called?
(a) Getting the message
(b) Paldom
(c) Loving my lover
(d) Feeling myself

10. What does Seinfeld find scarier than any of the rides at Coney Island?
(a) Falling ill
(b) His parents arguing
(c) A serious relationship
(d) The train ride there

11. What does Seinfeld think a woman has to like about the man she is dating?
(a) His wallet
(b) His job
(c) His clothes
(d) His humor

12. What does the little man at the terminal tell people how to do?
(a) Make a connecting flight
(b) Use your cell phones safely
(c) Put on a life jacket
(d) Board the plane orderly

13. Why do Seinfeld's friends presume he is gay?
(a) He is neat
(b) He drinks wine
(c) He does not like sport
(d) He has many girlfriends

14. What kind of room does Seinfeld think people should meet in before a date?
(a) An interview room
(b) A drawing room
(c) A prison visitation room
(d) A dining room

15. What is Seinfeld still too self-conscious to buy?
(a) Beer
(b) Dildos
(c) Condoms
(d) Hashish

Short Answer Questions

1. What does Seinfeld think men are afraid of?

2. What do driving schools remove from your driving license?

3. What does Seinfeld say is like a mirage in the desert?

4. What does Seinfeld think it is unnatural for people to do?

5. What does Seinfeld like to pretend he is when he is talking to a friend he does not like?

(see the answer keys)

This section contains 406 words (approx. 2 pages at 300 words per page) View a FREE sample