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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What does Seinfeld say he is not scared of?
(a) Walking
(b) Driving
(c) Running
(d) Flying

2. What word does Seinfeld find funny?
(a) Fumble
(b) Pretty ugly
(c) Tumbleweed
(d) Nightcap

3. What do you risk happening at the end of a date?
(a) Being turned away
(b) Being naked
(c) Feeling deflated
(d) Feeling drunk

4. What does Seinfeld say is like a mirage in the desert?
(a) Learner drivers
(b) Handicap parking spaces
(c) Drinking fountains
(d) Limos

5. What does Seinfeld say he is curious about?
(a) Body odor
(b) Dirty clothes
(c) Prostitutes
(d) Drugs

6. What is male friendship conditional on?
(a) Meeting a woman
(b) Watching sport
(c) Drinking beer
(d) The ego

7. What does Seinfeld believe men are like when it comes to sex?
(a) Soldiers
(b) Fireman
(c) Policeman
(d) Bums

8. What does Seinfeld say he has given often to his doctor?
(a) A blood sample
(b) A urine sample
(c) A hair sample
(d) A semen sample

9. What makes Seinfeld more nervous than flying?
(a) Greeting people at the other end
(b) Driving to the airport
(c) Meeting someone he knows on the plane
(d) Waiting to take off

10. Why is Seinfeld always nervous when he drives to the airport?
(a) He may have to pick up a strange hitchhiker
(b) He may miss his flight
(c) He may crash
(d) He may have forgotten something

11. What item of clothing does Seinfeld think a naked person should wear?
(a) A bag
(b) A tie
(c) A t-shirt
(d) A belt

12. What does Seinfeld believe does not exist?
(a) Aliens
(b) Dry cleaning
(c) Dishwashers
(d) Nice people

13. What does Seinfeld think there should always be a rule book for?
(a) Dating
(b) Conversation
(c) Sex
(d) Babies

14. What does Seinfeld say ruins leather jackets?
(a) The snow
(b) Beer stains
(c) Rain
(d) Food stains

15. What is the third section of this chapter called?
(a) Don't ask me for anything
(b) The gift of friendship
(c) Loving the hard way
(d) Favors

Short Answer Questions

1. What does Seinfeld believe women are like when it comes to sex?

2. What does Seinfeld say friends often ask for?

3. Why does Seinfeld say it is hard to do favors for people?

4. What of the following does Seinfeld list as a small thing on a plane?

5. What does Seinfeld think is a reflection of how you feel when you wake up in a strange house after a date?

(see the answer keys)

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