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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. In "An Alternative Viewpoint," where does Longshanks say Bobby Henderson purportedly sleep?
(a) In a crib.
(b) In a crypt.
(c) In a pyramid.
(d) In a coffin.

2. What does Henderson speculate could be the reason for Flying Spaghetti Monster touching?
(a) The FSM likes hitting humans on the head.
(b) The FSM does not want humans floating around in space.
(c) The FSM is trying to hold humans still.
(d) The FSM likes short people.

3. Henderson notes that college students tend to consume large amounts of what beverage?
(a) Water.
(b) Beer.
(c) Kool-Aid.
(d) Soda.

4. Henderson says that the Christian's Communion food is "basically" made of what substance?
(a) Stale bread.
(b) Paste.
(c) Cardboard.
(d) Sawdust.

5. What does Henderson NOT include as an ingredient in his recipe for life?
(a) Pepper.
(b) Elementary particles made from "string."
(c) Salt.
(d) Boiling water.

6. What does Henderson say caused the extinction of the dodo bird?
(a) Aboriginal children.
(b) Bigger birds.
(c) Global warming.
(d) The extinction of their favorite fish.

7. What image does Henderson use to describe the usefulness of Evolution?
(a) A screen door on a submarine.
(b) A porthole on a cruise ship.
(c) A scope on a submarine.
(d) A smoke stack on a freight ship.

8. What is the official drink of Pirates?
(a) Beer, or "rotgut."
(b) Beer, or "grog."
(c) Rum.
(d) Iced tea.

9. According to Henderson, what causes global warming?
(a) A decreasing Pirate population.
(b) The Flying Spaghetti Monster's boiling pasta.
(c) An increase in greenhouse gasses.
(d) The Flying Spaghetti Monster's simmering anger.

10. If witches do exist in the 21st century, why does Henderson say may be the reason they are not much of an issue?
(a) They call themselves Wiccans now, not witches.
(b) They are responsible for many trendy pop bands.
(c) They are all hiding and fireproofing themselves.
(d) The Flying Spaghetti Monster protects them.

11. How long did the Flying Spaghetti Monster spend making the Earth appear older?
(a) 100-1000 years.
(b) 1-10 years.
(c) 1-5 years.
(d) 10-100 years.

12. What is the Communion Test designed to prove?
(a) The existence of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
(b) That communion wafers are poisonous.
(c) That pasta is better than bread.
(d) The meatballs are healthy.

13. According to Henderson, what is the Buddhists' sacred text?
(a) The Holy Book of Buddhas.
(b) The Bananapada.
(c) The Ramayana.
(d) Rub Buddha's Belly.

14. What does Henderson say the Flying Spaghetti Monster spreads with his Noodly Appendage?
(a) Friendliness and parmesan.
(b) Butter.
(c) Pandemonium.
(d) Goodness and affordable nutrition.

15. Henderson says that the universe's matrix of springs is vibrating to what sound?
(a) The Flying Spaghetti Monster's voice.
(b) Saucy singing.
(c) Noodly music.
(d) The Flying Spaghetti Monster's guitar.

Short Answer Questions

1. What is the "one undeniable theory" mentioned in "An Alternate Vision?"

2. What common college food seems to indicate the Flying Spaghetti Monster's presence on college campuses?

3. Why does the Flying Spaghetti Monster manipulate scientific data?

4. What scientist is NOT included in Longshanks list of Evolution proponents?

5. What is the average height for humans today?

(see the answer keys)

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