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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Why does Seinfeld think the ambulance stickers are dangerous?
(a) A driver could get in an accident reading it
(b) A driver gets nervous when he reads it
(c) A driver immediately stops when he reads it
(d) A driver never looks into his mirror to read it

2. What does Seinfeld wonder if there are keys to?
(a) A fighter jet
(b) A helicopter
(c) A ferry
(d) A plane

3. What does Seinfeld talk about a woman doing to her legs?
(a) Waxing
(b) Tanning
(c) Shaving
(d) Slapping

4. What is male friendship conditional on?
(a) The ego
(b) Drinking beer
(c) Meeting a woman
(d) Watching sport

5. What does Seinfeld like to pretend he is when he is talking to a friend he does not like?
(a) A social worker
(b) A counselor
(c) A comedian
(d) A talkshow host

6. What does Seinfeld think a woman has to like about the man she is dating?
(a) His clothes
(b) His job
(c) His humor
(d) His wallet

7. What are men interested in doing to their hair?
(a) Removing it
(b) Transplanting it
(c) Growing it
(d) Shaving it

8. What does Seinfeld want to have on him when he sees people he knows walking down the street?
(a) A cell phone
(b) An answering machine
(c) A pepper spray
(d) A gun

9. What does Seinfeld believe does not exist?
(a) Aliens
(b) Nice people
(c) Dishwashers
(d) Dry cleaning

10. What does Seinfeld say is like a mirage in the desert?
(a) Learner drivers
(b) Drinking fountains
(c) Limos
(d) Handicap parking spaces

11. What kind of deodorant does Seinfeld say he does not like?
(a) Roll on deodrant
(b) All deodrant
(c) Deodrant with cologne
(d) Spray deodrant

12. What does Seinfeld believe is the uniform for all men?
(a) Suits
(b) Jeans and a t-shirt
(c) Track suits
(d) Pajamas

13. What is the second section of this chapter called?
(a) Loving my lover
(b) Feeling myself
(c) Getting the message
(d) Paldom

14. What can a woman do to a man?
(a) Paralyze him
(b) Suffocate him
(c) Take away his freedom
(d) Cook for him

15. Why do Seinfeld's friends presume he is gay?
(a) He is neat
(b) He has many girlfriends
(c) He drinks wine
(d) He does not like sport

Short Answer Questions

1. What does Seinfeld say he has given often to his doctor?

2. What does Seinfeld think men are afraid of?

3. What did Seinfeld's friend just have?

4. Why does Seinfeld think naked people are uncomfortable?

5. Who does Seinfeld feel sorry for in the subway?

(see the answer keys)

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