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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Who does the narrator of "Martha Stewart's Vagina" say can make an appearance in the vagina?
(a) The TV camera.
(b) Uninvited guests.
(c) Invisible women.
(d) Tiny bugs.

2. What, specifically, are Jews concerned about regarding their religion according to the narrator of "The New Judaism"?
(a) That kids are not hearing about it.
(b) The reading is too difficult.
(c) It is boring.
(d) That it is a health hazard.

3. How many punches are thrown to kill Senor Jangles in "Local News"?
(a) One.
(b) Fifty.
(c) Seventeen.
(d) Too many to count.

4. Where is the manuscript in "The Last Supper" discovered?
(a) In a glass bottle in the ocean.
(b) The Sinai Peninsula.
(c) With some college applications from Yale.
(d) Under President Clinton's mattress.

5. What is the profession of Senor Jangles' murderer in "Local News"?
(a) Truck driver.
(b) Dog sitter.
(c) Seamstress.
(d) Taco cook.

6. Who does Ford mistake Brezhnev for?
(a) His mother.
(b) Kissinger.
(c) Hitler.
(d) Lenin.

7. Which celebrities make a cameo in "Breakfast at Kennedy's"?
(a) Jonas Salk and Charles Lindberg.
(b) Michael Jackson and Harry Truman.
(c) FDR and Rodney King.
(d) Larry King and Rosie O'Donnell.

8. Which character is "top dog" at Choate?
(a) Teddy Kennedy.
(b) Jack Kennedy.
(c) Jackie Bouvier.
(d) Rosalie Kennedy.

9. What year does the narrator say da Vinci's notebook was lost?
(a) 1103.
(b) 1935.
(c) 1799.
(d) 1485.

10. What does the narrator of "Martha Stewart's Vagina" recommend for the exterior of the vagina?
(a) Hair removal.
(b) Rhinestones.
(c) Piercings.
(d) Hair dye.

11. According to the narrator of "The New Judaism", who do the Orthodox believe is the funniest man alive?
(a) Jackie Mason.
(b) Johnny Carson.
(c) Jimmy Stewart.
(d) Seinfeld.

12. What does Ford choke on during a meeting in 1976?
(a) A Jawbreaker.
(b) The coke that finally got opened.
(c) A hat.
(d) Chewing tobacco.

13. To whom do the Kennedys give an "extra child"?
(a) The President.
(b) Princess Diana.
(c) Mother Teresa.
(d) The narrator's father.

14. Who actually created the drawings in da Vinci's notebook, according to the narrator of "Da Vinci: the Lost Notebook,"?
(a) Machiavelli.
(b) His four-year-old.
(c) The pope.
(d) Diane Dwyer.

15. What affliction does Zach Hanson have?
(a) Gonorrhea.
(b) Whooping cough.
(c) Herpes.
(d) Cancer.

Short Answer Questions

1. According to the narrator of "Martha Stewart's Vagina," who recommended that Martha write an advice item about the vagina?

2. What century was da Vinci's notebook written in "Da Vinci: The Lost Notebook"?

3. What do the Cambodians hold captive while Ford tries to open a Coke bottle?

4. On what character is the New Judaism mascot based, according to the narrator of "The New Judaism"?

5. Who ends up opening Ford's Coke bottle?

(see the answer keys)

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