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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Doug Cottingham gives the beggar the keys to his________.
(a) Mercedes.
(b) House.
(c) Riding vacuum.
(d) Traveling sauna.

2. Tiny Tim's performance rivals the ________ for brightness.
(a) Moonlight.
(b) Spotlight.
(c) Street light.
(d) Exit sign.

3. The main problem Thaddeus Bristol sees in all the shows is the actors eagerness to ________.
(a) Act.
(b) Bow.
(c) Sing.
(d) Please.

4. What does Thaddeus Bristol say is ironically missing from each performance?
(a) Good scripts.
(b) Enthusiasm.
(c) Christmas spirit.
(d) Adorable children.

5. What does the mother who performed surgery on her own son say saved him in "Based Upon a True Story"?
(a) The Lord.
(b) Luck.
(c) Prayer.
(d) The weather.

6. What would the narrator use a silver wand for on Christmas day in "Christmas Means Giving"?
(a) Disappearing.
(b) Throwing up.
(c) Granting wishes.
(d) Stabbing beggars.

7. What are the names of the twins in "Christmas Means Giving"?
(a) Taylor and Weston.
(b) Dan and Bill.
(c) Hudson and Potomac.
(d) Smith and Wesson.

8. The narrator has three grills: one for beef, one for chicken and one for ________.
(a) Pork.
(b) Baked Alaska.
(c) Fish.
(d) Oriental pancakes.

9. What does the narrator build so he won't be outdone by the Cottinghams?
(a) Rotunda.
(b) Baseball field.
(c) Skating rink.
(d) Soccer field.

10. Where do they find the narrator's dead sons?
(a) A ditch.
(b) The Cottingham's basement.
(c) Their front yard.
(d) Traveling sauna.

11. Thaddeus Bristol says it's hard to look past Dickens' what?
(a) Brilliant dialogue.
(b) Egocentric language.
(c) Heart-warming story.
(d) Dime store morality.

12. What does he narrator give the beggar the first time he sees him in "Christmas Means Giving"?
(a) A turkey leg.
(b) A bite in the leg.
(c) A dollar.
(d) A coat.

13. What is Jim Timothy's show "Sun Roof Optional" about?
(a) Drowning children.
(b) Springbreak.
(c) Driving adventures.
(d) Detroit.

14. Jim Timothy describes the congregation as ___________.
(a) Stupid.
(b) Lovely.
(c) Ignorant.
(d) Devout.

15. What is all over the beggar's beard when he shows up at the narrator's door in "Christmas Means Giving"?
(a) Jam.
(b) Dressing.
(c) Blood.
(d) Mud.

Short Answer Questions

1. What is the name of the show at Scottsfield Elementary?

2. Who does Thaddeus Bristol blame for most the problems with "A Christmas Carol" performance?

3. What does Jim Timothy call the marriage of mini-series and holiday special?

4. How much time does Jim Timothy give the congregation to take him up on his offer?

5. Thaddeus Bristol says bad theater was used as torture before the invention of the _____.

(see the answer keys)

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