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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. According to Sedaris, Sallie Mae is located where?
(a) Missouri.
(b) Kansas.
(c) Nebraska.
(d) New York.

2. What name do the Dunbar's call Jackelyn's baby?
(a) John.
(b) Joe.
(c) Ted.
(d) Don.

3. What did Sedaris see someone dressed as and handing out leaflets on Lexington Avenue?
(a) Taco.
(b) Hot dog.
(c) Camcorder.
(d) Dog.

4. What is Kevin Dunbar majoring in at college?
(a) Vietnamese history.
(b) Pre-Law.
(c) Chemical engineering.
(d) Pre-med.

5. Sedaris likes to tell customers at SantaLand that their pictures will arrive in ________.
(a) December.
(b) July.
(c) January.
(d) August.

6. Where does Lisa take the phone to have a private conversation?
(a) Carport.
(b) Closet.
(c) Bathroom.
(d) Porch.

7. Jocelyn Dunbar's motto is "A family is not a ___________."
(a) Charitable organization.
(b) Good time.
(c) Choice.
(d) Commune.

8. Sedaris hopes to end every episode of "Socrates and Company" with what?
(a) A car chase.
(b) A joke.
(c) A gun fight.
(d) A revelation.

9. What is the feeling Sedaris has for his sister Lisa at the end of "Dinah, the Christmas Whore"?
(a) Pity.
(b) Frustration.
(c) Pride.
(d) Fear.

10. Sedaris's father believes jobs ________.
(a) Improve integrity.
(b) Interfere with homework.
(c) Build character.
(d) Build bank accounts.

11. Where does Sedaris picture Socrates helping after he loses his memory?
(a) Santa Fe.
(b) St. Louis.
(c) Las Vegas.
(d) Denver.

12. Sedaris compares Sallie Mae to a __________.
(a) Beast.
(b) Sexy lady.
(c) Grandmother.
(d) Hillbilly.

13. Where does Sedaris arrive in New York City?
(a) Times Square.
(b) Grand Central Station.
(c) Penn Station.
(d) Port Authority.

14. What is the name of the cafeteria where Sedaris gets a job?
(a) K & W.
(b) Tiffany.
(c) Cambridge.
(d) Piccadilly.

15. Sedaris hopes to gain wisdom from the _______ that work at the cafeteria with him.
(a) Convicts.
(b) Managers.
(c) Students.
(d) Women.

Short Answer Questions

1. Where is David Sedaris when he sees the SantaLand ad?

2. Where does Kevin Dunbar go to college?

3. Sedaris believes his sister Lisa's greatest desire was to be _________.

4. What is the name of the street the Dunbar's live on?

5. One afternoon they set a record at SantaLand by getting _______ people through in one hour.

(see the answer keys)

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