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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What is Sedaris's elf name?
(a) Snowball.
(b) Puff.
(c) Crumpet.
(d) Sleighbell.

2. What was the name of Clifford Dunbar's first wife?
(a) Cheryl Kerr.
(b) Babs Swint.
(c) Dana Babson.
(d) Doll Babcock.

3. Sedaris believes his sister Lisa's greatest desire was to be _________.
(a) Exotic.
(b) Famous.
(c) Annoying.
(d) Typical.

4. What did Sedaris see someone dressed as and handing out leaflets on Lexington Avenue?
(a) Camcorder.
(b) Hot dog.
(c) Taco.
(d) Dog.

5. Sedaris discovers while working at the cafeteria that most people are what?
(a) Lazy.
(b) Kind.
(c) Smart.
(d) Frightened.

6. How long was Clifford Dunbar married the first time?
(a) 6 months.
(b) 4 months.
(c) 8 months.
(d) 9 months.

7. Who is the mall Santa in "Dinah, the Christmas Whore"?
(a) Street person.
(b) Retired principal.
(c) Mayor.
(d) Police chief.

8. Joceylyn Dunbar compares Khe Sahn to what?
(a) Pekinese.
(b) Cockatoo.
(c) Siamese cat.
(d) Terrier.

9. What time is Sedaris's plane supposed to leave in "SantaLand Diaries"?
(a) 11 p.m.
(b) 10 p.m.
(c) 9 p.m.
(d) 8 p.m.

10. How much money does Lisa give Sedaris to get him to go somewhere with her on the birthday?
(a) $10.
(b) $1.
(c) $3.
(d) $5.

11. How old is Sedaris is "SantaLand Diaries"?
(a) 33.
(b) 53.
(c) 23.
(d) 43.

12. SantaLand is part of Macy's ___________.
(a) Herald Square
(b) Times Square.
(c) Grand Central Station.
(d) Central Park.

13. How quickly could Santa and elf Sedaris get kids on and off Santa's lap on Christmas Eve?
(a) 90 seconds.
(b) 30 seconds.
(c) 45 seconds.
(d) 60 seconds.

14. The cafeteria where Sedaris works is decorated in ________.
(a) Fake leather.
(b) Black velet.
(c) Fake wood.
(d) Red velvet.

15. Where does Lisa take the phone to have a private conversation?
(a) Bathroom.
(b) Porch.
(c) Carport.
(d) Closet.

Short Answer Questions

1. Sedaris hopes to end every episode of "Socrates and Company" with what?

2. How long does it take the police to get the Dunbars home after Jocelyn calls them?

3. Sedaris graciously accepts leaflets from someone dressed as a ______ .

4. What is Sedaris's job at the cafeteria?

5. What does Sedaris decide to wear for the Christmas season he works at the cafeteria?

(see the answer keys)

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