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This test consists of 5 multiple choice questions, 5 short answer questions, and 10 short essay questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. When the narrator imagines a future archaeological dig at a lost city, what does he think the rediscovered city will be called?
(a) Big Sky.
(b) Big Apple.
(c) Big Easy.
(d) Big Nothing.

2. The archaeologists may think that Colonel Sanders is a ________________.
(a) military officer.
(b) guru.
(c) priest.
(d) shaman.

3. Ironically, the happy, family, outdoorsy vehicle known as the camper is now used by the Mafia as ____________________________.
(a) A gun shop.
(b) A liquor store.
(c) A whorehouse.
(d) A drug den.

4. How did the Igloo finally win the ice cream war?
(a) Started offering sandwiches too.
(b) Added 20 new flavors.
(c) Gave ice cream for free.
(d) Put a cherry on top of everything.

5. Why was the narrator always seated at the back of the class?
(a) He is not a troublemaker.
(b) He has perfect eyesight and can see the board from there.
(c) He is one of the tallest kids in class.
(d) His last name is near the end of the alphabet.

Short Answer Questions

1. What might be a typical correspondence course offered through the catalog?

2. How is the Johnson Smith catalog distributed?

3. What disturbing information did the groundskeeper at the park tell the boys?

4. What was the name of the General Motors magazine for which the narrator wrote an article?

5. Why does the narrator find the environmentally conscious bumper stickers on vans ironic?

Short Essay Questions

1. Describe the narrator's surprise inspiration in Algebra class and how he avoided looking like the failure he was sure he was.

2. How does the narrator's experience in the Lincoln Tunnel mirror his demeanor during his school years?

3. Why does the narrator attribute his academic doom to classroom seating?

4. What has the NLGA done to try to counteract the negative perceptions of lemons?

5. Describe how Mr. Leggett managed to drive The Happy Cow out of business.

6. What human foibles does the Johnson Smith catalog prey on and why does the narrator appreciate it?

7. What was the worst case scenario of a BNA?

8. What are the differences in driving styles between the Camper Crowd and van people?

9. How was the great Ice Cream War another example of brains vs. brawn in the narrator's life?

10. Who is Howard and why is he so depressed about the word "lemon"?

(see the answer keys)

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