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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Why was the narrator always seated at the back of the class?
(a) He is not a troublemaker.
(b) He has perfect eyesight and can see the board from there.
(c) He is one of the tallest kids in class.
(d) His last name is near the end of the alphabet.

2. What was the narrator's first class in high school?
(a) Biology.
(b) Physics.
(c) Latin.
(d) Algebra.

3. The narrator compares Van Culture with the ___________________.
(a) Station Wagon Set.
(b) Sedan Set.
(c) Cycle Crowd.
(d) Camper Crowd.

4. According to Howard, what are the BNAs?
(a) Big Network Accounts.
(b) Bad News Accounts.
(c) Bananas, Nectarines and Apples.
(d) Banking News Associations.

5. The archaeologists will probably think that TV commercials are some form of ______________.
(a) Pornography.
(b) Religion.
(c) Communism.
(d) Mating ritual.

6. Why does the narrator find the environmentally conscious bumper stickers on vans ironic?
(a) Vans are big polluters.
(b) Vans run on ethanol.
(c) Vans are electric.
(d) Vans are all diesel.

7. What does the narrator speculate that the archaeologists will find in the city?
(a) Laptops.
(b) TV commercials.
(c) iPods.
(d) Minivans.

8. Who does the narrator say are not heroes anymore?
(a) Working men.
(b) Ministers.
(c) Teachers.
(d) Fathers.

9. What local landmark did the narrator see when returning to his hometown?
(a) Maid-Rite sandwich shop.
(b) Yankee soldier statue.
(c) Igloo ice cream parlor.
(d) Little League diamonds.

10. Who was the owner of the Igloo ice cream shop?
(a) Mr. Leggett.
(b) Mr. Larson.
(c) Mr. Hall.
(d) Mr. Levine.

11. The narrator finds that Van people and Camper people are all ________________.
(a) Comedians.
(b) Criminals.
(c) Retired.
(d) Smug.

12. What might be a typical correspondence course offered through the catalog?
(a) Cooking lessons.
(b) Ukelele lessons.
(c) Typing lessons.
(d) Knitting lessons.

13. What did Flick say that his grandfather drank to cure a cold?
(a) Paint thinner.
(b) Whiskey.
(c) Kerosene.
(d) Lemon juice.

14. In what class did the narrator's back row fakery defenses not work?
(a) English.
(b) Chemistry.
(c) Algebra.
(d) History.

15. According to the narrator, Van people are ___________________.
(a) Soccer moms.
(b) Teenagers.
(c) Bearded hippies.
(d) Conformists.

Short Answer Questions

1. What is the narrator's brother's name?

2. What disturbing information did the groundskeeper at the park tell the boys?

3. What item in the catalog would appeal to the violent?

4. What did Howard publish on behalf of his client, the National Lemon Growers Association?

5. Which animals stun the archaeologists in the commercials?

(see the answer keys)

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