3. How does Ellen feel about the way she looks?
(a) She is insecure.
(b) She is confident.
(c) She is ashamed.
(d) She changes all the time.

4. Why did Ellen not like people using fans on planes?
(a) She thought it would anger the pilot.
(b) It sent smells wafting.
(c) It made her too cold.
(d) She thought it would take energy from the engine.

5. Why did Ellen start overfeeding her dogs?
(a) To make them healthy.
(b) To give them energy.
(c) To bribe them.
(d) To have something to do.

6. What does Ellen say some young boys would learn from her mistake with a cake?
(a) How to deal with hangovers.
(b) Who not to hire.
(c) How to help in the kitchen.
(d) Where the liquor cabinet is.

7. What ingredient does Ellen make fun of in Chapter 11?
(a) Bacon.
(b) Eggs.
(c) Flour.
(d) Milk.

8. How does Ellen say children should learn about sex?
(a) Go to the theater.
(b) Watch cable.
(c) Watch a live birth.
(d) Read a book.

9. How does Ellen say she proves she is a girl?
(a) She goes to the women's restroom.
(b) She is short.
(c) She has PMS.
(d) She orders dessesrt.

10. Who did Ellen call bad names at a party with her friend?
(a) An old woman.
(b) A young girl.
(c) A reverend.
(d) A young boy.

11. What is the title of Chapter 11?
(a) Things That Sound Like a Good Idea at First, But Really Aren't.
(b) Things That Should Never Be Attempted.
(c) Things That I Will Never Again Do as They are Stupid.
(d) Things That Lead to Happiness in Life.

12. What did Ellen do when she thought she heard a crash dive on a plane?
(a) Swore.
(b) Fainted.
(c) Drank some whiskey.
(d) Threw up.

13. Who did Ellen offend when she thought she heard a crash dive on a plane?
(a) An old woman.
(b) A nun.
(c) A handsome man.
(d) The stewardess.

14. Why does Ellen say she would be a good mother?
(a) She loves children.
(b) She is a good communicator.
(c) She has learned from her mother.
(d) She keeps animals alive.

15. What was Ellen told her animal was in a former life?
(a) An eagle.
(b) An egg roll.
(c) An adulterous man.
(d) A tiger.