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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Sedaris' interest in science extended only to
(a) Getting his pets drunk and thawing them out again.
(b) Fixing his record player and exploring marine life.
(c) Freezing animals and fixing his record player.
(d) Performing surgery on his pets.

2. One bi-product of new computer technology that Sedaris finds unfortunate is
(a) The family newsletter.
(b) The internet.
(c) The family tree.
(d) YouTube.

3. Where music is concerned, Sedaris' father could be described as a
(a) Dreamer.
(b) Realist.
(c) Professional.
(d) Skeptic.

4. Why is Sedaris offered a job teaching a writing workshop?
(a) He is friends with the department chair.
(b) He has teaching experience.
(c) He has been published several times.
(d) The scheduled professor quit at the last moment.

5. What prompts Sedaris to find a job in New York?
(a) His father disapproves of his lifestyle.
(b) He is ashamed of his poverty.
(c) He cannot live on his savings alone in New York.
(d) He is planning to buy a townhouse.

6. Sedaris suggests his brother is radically different from his other siblings because
(a) He is the oldest, and therefore the most conservative.
(b) He is much younger, and a North Carolina native.
(c) He is a North Carolina native with gentlemanly Southern values.
(d) He is more refined than they are.

7. Sedaris first compares his speech therapist to
(a) A government agent.
(b) A supermodel.
(c) A football player.
(d) The devil.

8. Sedaris believed he was living art because
(a) He allowed a friend to shoot him in the shoulder.
(b) He was finally off drugs and moving past performance art.
(c) He sold silk sceens of footprints.
(d) He was on drugs and deluded by his own sense of self-importance.

9. One reason Sedaris resists the computer is
(a) He believes the computer cannot translate his words correctly.
(b) He likes to see the physical product of his work, as he does with a typewriter.
(c) He likes travelling with the typewriter.
(d) He likes to be able to physically correct his mistakes using Liquid Paper.

10. Sedaris fears his father is not up to the task of caring for his new dog, Sophie, because
(a) She is violent and does not obey him.
(b) He is older now, and she is old and dying.
(c) He is not as attentive to pets as he used to be.
(d) He is older now, and she is young and strong.

11. Bonnie is most interested in
(a) Visiting tourist traps.
(b) Learning about local culture.
(c) Staying inside to avoid New Yorkers.
(d) Following Sedaris' agenda.

12. Sedaris refuses to order dessert because
(a) It contains non-traditional ingredients like luncheon meat.
(b) He cannot pronounce it.
(c) It contains fattening creme fraiche.
(d) He is insulted by the waiter's suggestion that he is counting calories.

13. Before Paul's personality fully emerged, his parents tried to interest him in
(a) Girls and dating.
(b) Writing and painting.
(c) Math and science.
(d) Music and sports.

14. What is Lou Sedaris excited about at the start of the essay?
(a) David is going to appear in a magazine article.
(b) His daughter, Amy, is going to appear in a magazine article.
(c) His daughter, Amy, is getting married.
(d) His daughter ,Amy, has lost a considerable amount of weight.

15. Instead of the performance piece in the twelfth "moment," Sedaris seems to admire
(a) The metaphors apparent in the performance.
(b) The courage of the performer.
(c) The number of people attending the performance.
(d) The beauty of the ordinary world around him.

Short Answer Questions

1. After his gourmet meal, Sedaris elects to

2. Sedaris decides to make his students more comfortable by

3. Sedaris resents his father's approach toward art because

4. The name "Rooster" came from

5. Sedaris discovers that most of the boys in speech therapy are

(see the answer keys)

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