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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Where is the sappy woman from?
(a) Medicine Hat.
(b) Ypsilanti.
(c) Renfrew.
(d) Hadaugago.

2. According to Kurt, what are we not born with?
(a) Instinct.
(b) Imagination.
(c) Intelligence.
(d) Passion.

3. What is a lot less friendly to Kurt now that he is 82?
(a) Sunlight.
(b) Pain.
(c) Gravity.
(d) Radiation.

4. How tall are the aliens?
(a) Six centimeters.
(b) Six feet.
(c) Six inches.
(d) Six meters.

5. What does the Bible say is a good thing to do?
(a) Be wrathful to one's enemies.
(b) Honor one's ancestors.
(c) Beggar thy neighbor.
(d) Read the Bible often.

6. According to Kurt, where did napalm come from?
(a) Mother nature.
(b) Harvard.
(c) The Soviet Union.
(d) Weapons labs.

7. How often does Gil have sex?
(a) Once a week.
(b) Once a day.
(c) Once a year.
(d) Never.

8. What type of attack is it not possible to survive?
(a) Chemical weapon attack.
(b) Biological weapon attack.
(c) Terrorist attack.
(d) Hydrogen bomb attack.

9. How long ago did Kurt's business fail?
(a) 11 years ago.
(b) 26 years ago.
(c) 42 years ago.
(d) 33 years ago.

10. Which of Mark Twain's family and/or friends died before him?
(a) All of the above.
(b) His wife.
(c) Two of his daughters.
(d) His best friend.

11. What can Kurt not do well now that he is 82?
(a) Change gears.
(b) Parallel park.
(c) Read road signs.
(d) Drive.

12. What is the only proof Kurt needs for the existence of God?
(a) His children.
(b) Music.
(c) The singing of birds.
(d) The sunrise.

13. What color are the aliens?
(a) Grey.
(b) Pink.
(c) Mauve.
(d) Green.

14. What are the people that Kurt blames for ruining America born without?
(a) Silver spoons in their mouths.
(b) Eyesight.
(c) Hearing.
(d) Consciences.

15. What does Kurt tell Joe he must do?
(a) Live life to the fullest.
(b) Be kind.
(c) Be a saint.
(d) Make the world a better place.

Short Answer Questions

1. 'The good Earth--we could have saved it, but we were too damn...'

2. What would Ivan the Terrible nail to your head if you disagreed with him?

3. What does Gil Berman do for a living?

4. According to Kurt, what occupied country has America become like?

5. What does each short chapter in "Cat's Cradle" represent?

(see the answer keys)

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