Chapter 17 Summary and Analysis

We are redefined by the changes in our lives, including the losses of those close to us. Research shows that during periods of stability that alternate with transition, we build the definition of ourselves. During the transitional periods, we question the structure, or definition, and change it accordingly. Losing our youth is particularly poignant, since we often feel that we are still young, or that we just got started. However, our bodies and systems change and our children grow up. Our sexuality is no longer noticeable.

Susan Sontag says that women become sexually ineligible much earlier than men, and Viorst suggests that a woman may fear age because it will "steal her power" and possibly cause her to fear being abandoned and vulnerable.

Middle age can be a time of letting go of our youth, dreams, plans and ideals, and make...