Chapter 14 Summary and Analysis

Viorst describes a mother's anxiety over her children's safety, and how mothers really do believe that their physical presence can keep their child safe, linking separation from the children with danger to them. We fear for our children's "psyches," and try to accommodate every small nuance of their personalities, "orchestrating their environment," to protect them from discomfort. Our own painful childhood separations can influence our feelings about letting our children go. This can stretch to being too careful about reassuring them, being too understanding and not allowing the child to be frustrated. Children whose feelings are constantly analyzed will tend to shut themselves off to preserve the self.

It is important to let our children be who they are, even if we are disappointed in them. We indulge our children with the things we did not have in an attempt to...