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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. In "Valentino," what did the press find in a men's bathroom that caused them to mock Valentino and his "Latin Lover" image?
(a) Pink talcum-powder.
(b) A bar of lavender-scented soap-on-a-rope.
(c) Underwear with a hole in it.
(d) Women's perfume.

2. What was the function of the Bill of Rights, per "Mr. Justice Holmes"?
(a) To protect Americans from the tyranny of the state.
(b) To ensure a pistol or shotgun is available in every household.
(c) To protect the aristocracy from the low classes.
(d) To protect religion from devil worshippers.

3. Why did Valentino invite Mencken to dinner?
(a) To challenge him to a duel for libel.
(b) To beg him to ask a young woman out on a date for him.
(c) To ask for advice about a fight with a New York newspaper.
(d) To advise him on whether or not to take an upcoming film role.

4. What is wrong, in Mencken's opinion, with most artists' depictions of death?
(a) They show death to be dramatic and heroic, which is false.
(b) They show death to be pathetic and ridiculous, which is false.
(c) They never show women dying, only men.
(d) They are obsessed with death in battle, when death usually happens in the bathtub.

5. What was Calvin Coolidge's chief trait, according to Mencken?
(a) "A terrific ability to arrive at the wrong place, but at the right time."
(b) "Self-induced narcolepsy."
(c) "A hide as tough as a rhinoceros, and a horn to match."
(d) "A great appetite for jams and jellies."

6. What was the art discussed in "The Comedian"?
(a) Street musicianship.
(b) Stage acting.
(c) Pantomime.
(d) Television situational comedy.

7. How had Wallace behaved in "The Wallace Paranoia"?
(a) He had managed difficult times with great elegance.
(b) He had been a bumbler and an "ass."
(c) He was flirting with "most every thing in a dress."
(d) He was convinced there are Communist space aliens.

8. How was Mencken able to get a taxi driver to drive him to a speakeasy in Pennsylvania?
(a) He threatened the driver with jail time.
(b) He gave the driver a ten dollar bill.
(c) He agreed to write an article about the driver.
(d) He showed the driver the musical score from a Bach concert.

9. According to Mencken, why was Samuel Johnson unique as an artist?
(a) He never cared about his own fame or legacy.
(b) He never turned against his country, unlike all artists.
(c) He always gave to charity, and artists are infamous misers.
(d) He has a particularly thrilling prose style.

10. What memorable simile did Mencken use for Grover Cleveland?
(a) Cleveland was like a crocodile waiting to snap his jaws around the American public.
(b) Cleveland was like a newborn babe gazing at the stars for the first time.
(c) Cleveland was like a steel ship loaded with monoliths of granite.
(d) Cleveland was like a fragile butterfly with wings of dynamite.

11. What criticism did Mencken have for a book filled with sayings and writings about death?
(a) The book had nothing from the ancient Greeks.
(b) The book failed to include the work of Theodore Dreiser.
(c) The book failed to mention music at all.
(d) The book had three quotations attributed to the contemptible Oliver Wendell Holmes.

12. What happened when Mencken sent a junior reporter to get him liquor during the Republican National Convention?
(a) The reporter stole liquor from an aristocrat's secret stash.
(b) The convention organizers caught Mencken and toss him out.
(c) The reporter encountered drunken goons, and failed to get any liquor.
(d) The junior reporter was arrested and spends the night in jail.

13. What was the subject of the Scopes monkey trial?
(a) The assault of a zoo heckler by a gorilla.
(b) A treasonous plot to help a Central American country.
(c) The teaching of evolution.
(d) The kidnapping of a chimpanzee.

14. What was Roosevelt's strategy at the Democratic National Convention of 1932?
(a) He wished to delay as much as possible, and honor every minor parliamentary procedure.
(b) Roosevelt had a comic struggle to obtain the highest podium, so he might look the tallest.
(c) He wished to rush motions through and bypass parliamentary procedures.
(d) He wished to bribe key officials for the nomination.

15. Why did Mencken call democracy a "self-limiting disease"?
(a) Democracy does damage, but the damage it can do is limited.
(b) Democracy achieves equality, and once equality is achieved, democracy has nothing to accomplish.
(c) Members of the Democratic Party inflict damage on themselves through numerous scandals.
(d) Democracy is able to place limits on the power of politicians.

Short Answer Questions

1. What was the point of the section, "Sententiae"?

2. Who was FDR's chief opponent in the Democratic Convention of 1932?

3. Who was Mencken with at a Bach concert in Pennsylvania when he decided to get some liquor?

4. What might Mencken say was Grover Cleveland's defining trait?

5. What did Mencken attribute to the fall of the "good man" in "A Good Man Gone Wrong"?

(see the answer keys)

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