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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What has happened to the narrator's sisters in the first essay?
(a) They were imprisoned.
(b) They ran away.
(c) They were kidnapped.
(d) They joined the circus.

2. Who does the author's mother deduce would use a knife to perpetrate a crime?
(a) A chef.
(b) A drug addict.
(c) A burglar.
(d) A child.

3. What does the author's father collect in a goldfish bowl for good luck?
(a) Marbles.
(b) Golf balls.
(c) Pebbles.
(d) Golf tees.

4. What is the title of Sedaris' second essay in Naked?
(a) The Women's Open.
(b) A Plague of Tics.
(c) Chipped Beef.
(d) The Dragon in the Basement.

5. Where does the author's mother's family live?
(a) Philadelphia, PA.
(b) Rochester, NY.
(c) Binghamton, NY.
(d) Mt. Ida, NY.

6. Where does the author hide for his "stakeout" in "True Detective"?
(a) The attic.
(b) His closet.
(c) His father's bathroom.
(d) His father's closet.

7. What does the narrator say his sister Lisa wouldn't know "if he crawled into her lap with a fistful of daisies"?
(a) A sensitive loner.
(b) A fugitive.
(c) A true detective.
(d) A criminal.

8. What color towels does the author's mother replace the old ones with in "True Detective"?
(a) White.
(b) Brown.
(c) Blue.
(d) Yellow.

9. What does the author refer to his minister as in the first essay?
(a) A clown.
(b) An orthodox.
(c) A tippler.
(d) A reformer.

10. What do the author's mother and older sister share a love for?
(a) Romance novels.
(b) Detectives.
(c) Monster movies.
(d) Spaghetti.

11. The person in the newspaper article was robbed of $300 and what?
(a) A wig.
(b) A jackhammer.
(c) A clock radio.
(d) Golf clubs.

12. What denomination is the money in Lou Sedaris' dresser drawer?
(a) Tens.
(b) Twenties.
(c) Silver dollars.
(d) One-dollar bills.

13. Who stabs the author in the eye with a pencil?
(a) Amy.
(b) Sharon.
(c) Lisa.
(d) Tiffany.

14. The author writes in "True Detective," that to listen to his mother you'd have thought the streets of Raleigh were crawling with what?
(a) Detectives.
(b) Hippies.
(c) Heroin addicts.
(d) Zombies.

15. What does the author's mother claim happened to their first cat in the first essay?
(a) It loved David.
(b) It committed suicide.
(c) It caught on fire.
(d) It killed a mouse.

Short Answer Questions

1. Who does the author's father say that Ya Ya found dead in the middle of the road?

2. What is the author's teacher's name in the second essay?

3. What does the author's mother run over while taking him home from play practice?

4. Who curses at the author's father in "The Women's Open"?

5. How many siblings does the author have?

(see the answer keys)

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