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This test consists of 5 multiple choice questions, 5 short answer questions, and 10 short essay questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Where does a mother instruct her son to pee in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) On the artificial snow
(b) On Santa's lap
(c) In the corner of Santa's house
(d) On the Magic Star

2. What does the narrator change his elf name to when he has bad days at work in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Blisters
(b) Troll
(c) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle
(d) Grumpy

3. Why did Vicki quit chorus during her sophomore year of high school in "Jamboree"?
(a) The music teacher told her she had no talent.
(b) She decided to take Art instead.
(c) She hated her music teacher.
(d) Her brother talked her out of enrolling in chorus.

4. What is the author's elf name in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Crumpet
(b) Walrus
(c) Usher
(d) Sleighbell

5. What is the title of the magazine the narrator's sister gives him in "Giantess"?
(a) Giantess
(b) Guns for Women
(c) Knocked Up and Gun Toting
(d) Trample and Crush

Short Answer Questions

1. What does the old man say to the narrator that makes her vomit in "After Malison"?

2. What does the narrator order at the hotel bar in "After Malison"?

3. Where did Malison grow up in "After Malison"?

4. Which of the following words/phrases is NOT part of Khe Sahn's vocabulary according to Jocelyn in "Season's Greetings..."?

5. Why does Jocelyn repeatedly yell at Khe Sahn in "Season's Greetings..."?

Short Essay Questions

1. Describe the scene in Macy's on Christmas Eve in "Santaland Diaries".

2. Describe Kyle Dunbar in "Season's Greetings to Our Family and Friends".

3. Who is Trudy Chase in "Barrel Fever"? How does the narrator react to a phone call from Trudy?

4. How does Jocelyn feel about her daughter's marriage to Timothy Speaks in "Season's Greetings..."? How does this compare to her feelings about her grandson, Don?

5. Describe the experience of visiting the oldest Santa in "Santaland Diaries".

6. How does the narrator deal with parents requesting to visit a Santa of a certain race in "Santaland Diaries"?

7. Describe "the Walrus" in "Santaland Diaries".

8. How does the author feel about adults who dress in costumes for their jobs in "Santaland Diaries"? How does he believe he will be different if he is hired as one of Santa's elves?

9. Describe Dolph's confrontation with Alicia Cunningham in "Barrel Fever".

10. Who is Jamboree in "Jamboree"? How does the narrator feel about him?

(see the answer keys)

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