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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Why is the narrator of "Jamboree" staying with his sister?
(a) He is protecting his sister.
(b) He is looking for a new apartment.
(c) He cannot afford to rent his own apartment.
(d) His father threw him out.

2. Who was Lena Payne in "The Curly Kind"?
(a) The author's childhood housekeeper
(b) A nanny in the author's apartment complex
(c) A maid in the author's apartment complex
(d) The author's mother

3. What does Lena offer the author as a gift in "The Curly Kind"?
(a) A vacuum cleaner
(b) A chicken
(c) A magazine
(d) Nothing

4. Who does Sedaris impersonate singing "Away in the Manger" while working with Santa Santa in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Etta James
(b) Bob Hope
(c) Santa Santa
(d) Billie Holiday

5. What does Malison name each of the characters in his second novel in "After Malison"?
(a) Malison
(b) Smithy Smithy
(c) A. Davenport
(d) Professor Nobody

6. What role did Sleighbell, the elf play on "One Life to Live" in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Tina
(b) A doctor
(c) An elf
(d) A flamenco dancer

7. Who is Lonnie Tipit in "Season's Greetings..."?
(a) A teacher at the Dunbar children's school
(b) A Vietnamese interpreter
(c) Khe Sahn's uncle
(d) One of the Dunbars' neighbors

8. Why is the narrator of "After Malison" desperate to talk with Malison one-on-one?
(a) She is trying to keep him away from her friend Bethany.
(b) She believes she understands his work in a way others do not.
(c) She wants him to read her new novel.
(d) She is in love with him.

9. Which celebrity does the narrator feel the need to point out to visitors to Santa Land in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Goldie Hawn
(b) Walter Cronkite
(c) Simone from "General Hospital"
(d) Phil Collins

10. What does the narrator order at the hotel bar in "After Malison"?
(a) A daiquiri
(b) A boilermaker
(c) A soda
(d) A martini

11. Who are the readers of "Giantess" magazine?
(a) People who secretly want to be giants
(b) People who want tips for becoming giantesses
(c) People who love erotic stories about large women
(d) People who want tips for slaying giantesses

12. Why does Vicki drop out of high school in "Jamboree"?
(a) She says she didn't like having to attend school during the day.
(b) She was failing all of her classes.
(c) She was offered a recording contract.
(d) She wanted to annoy her father.

13. Why does Marty have Vicki's cat put to sleep in "Jamboree"?
(a) He is allergic to cats.
(b) He does not think he can love the cat as much as his baby.
(c) He believes the cat will kill his newborn baby.
(d) He hates cats.

14. What do the siblings find in sealed boxes after their mother dies in "Barrel Fever"?
(a) Memories of their childhood
(b) All of the gifts they sent her over the years
(c) Books
(d) Their mother's secret letter collection

15. What does Khe Sahn wear to Thanksgiving dinner in "Season's Greetings..."?
(a) Nothing
(b) A dress Jocelyn made for her
(c) An extremely short dress
(d) A bikini

Short Answer Questions

1. Which of the following is NOT a suggestion the editor of Giantess magazine gives the narrator in "Giantess"?

2. Why is the author uncomfortable working as Exit Elf in "Santaland Diaries"?

3. What does Sedaris notice happens to the giantess characters in the stories as they grow in "Giantess"?

4. What game do the narrator and his siblings play during Christmas in "Diary of a Smoker"?

5. How does the author meet G.L. in "The Curly Kind"?

(see the answer keys)

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