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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. Who did the narrator of "Jamboree" believe would want to "cash in" on his sister's success?
(a) Their mother
(b) Their step-mother
(c) His brother-in-law
(d) Their father

2. What does the narrator notice about all of the people hired as elves in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) They are all short.
(b) They are all unemployed actors.
(c) They are all 18-25 years old.
(d) They are all Caucasian.

3. Who does Sedaris impersonate singing "Away in the Manger" while working with Santa Santa in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Billie Holiday
(b) Santa Santa
(c) Bob Hope
(d) Etta James

4. What is Snowball, the elf known for in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Flooding the locker room bathroom
(b) Getting undressed in the middle of the locker room
(c) Being overly perky with the customers
(d) Flirting with the other elves and the Santas

5. What did the narrator's sister, Vicki aspire to be when she was younger? ("Jamboree")
(a) A dancer
(b) A designer
(c) A record producer
(d) A singer

6. What is the Magic Star in "Santaland Diaries"?
(a) Where children tell Santa what they want for Christmas
(b) Where people stand to see Santa through a window
(c) Where the line into Santa Land begins
(d) Where children share their wishes

7. Where is Mrs. Dunbar, supposedly, when Don is killed in "Season's Greetings..."?
(a) At the Dunbar's home
(b) At her neighbor, Cherise's house
(c) In bed
(d) Christmas shopping

8. What reason does the narrator of "After Malison" give for smoking in the hotel lobby?
(a) She says she is nervous about meeting Malison.
(b) She says it's too cold to smoke outside.
(c) She says she is waiting for Malison.
(d) She says her husband doesn't like her smoking in their room.

9. What does Sedaris think every male reader of "Giantess" longs for?
(a) Size
(b) Infancy
(c) A woman
(d) Punishment

10. Why does Marty have Vicki's cat put to sleep in "Jamboree"?
(a) He hates cats.
(b) He believes the cat will kill his newborn baby.
(c) He does not think he can love the cat as much as his baby.
(d) He is allergic to cats.

11. Where did Malison grow up in "After Malison"?
(a) Rotunda Surf
(b) Los Angeles
(c) New York City
(d) Chesterton

12. What does Sedaris notice happens to the giantess characters in the stories as they grow in "Giantess"?
(a) They like small men even better.
(b) They become moody and aggressive.
(c) They become gentle and docile.
(d) They become sexually distant.

13. What was Clifford's "second biggest mistake of his life" according to his wife in "Season's Greetings..."?
(a) The birth of their son, Kevin
(b) His marriage to Jocelyn Dunbar
(c) His affair with a Vietnamese woman
(d) His marriage to Doll Babcock

14. Why is the narrator of "Jamboree" staying with his sister?
(a) He cannot afford to rent his own apartment.
(b) He is looking for a new apartment.
(c) His father threw him out.
(d) He is protecting his sister.

15. What does Lena offer the author as a gift in "The Curly Kind"?
(a) A magazine
(b) A chicken
(c) A vacuum cleaner
(d) Nothing

Short Answer Questions

1. Which of the following was NOT in the file drawer labeled "POISON" in "Barrel Fever"?

2. Why did Vicki quit chorus during her sophomore year of high school in "Jamboree"?

3. According to Jocelyn Dunbar in "Season's Greetings...", who is the most intelligent of her children"

4. What is Don's legal name in "Season's Greetings...."?

5. What frightens the narrator most about his job as an elf in "Santaland Diaries"?

(see the answer keys)

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