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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What is Dirk looking forward to when he gets out of the hospital?
(a) A meat-eating detective business.
(b) A new phase of fridge ownership.
(c) A class-action lawsuit against lawsuits.
(d) A hot fudges sundae.

2. How did Thor take care of the fighter pilot's wife?
(a) By giving her a golden hammer.
(b) By repairing her house.
(c) By fixing the lottery for her.
(d) By selling his stock.

3. What does Dirk think the eagle's talons could easily rip up?
(a) An oak tree.
(b) A leather sofa.
(c) A small Volvo.
(d) A jet fighter.

4. What befalls Toe Rag and the green-eyed monster?
(a) They are eaten by the Guilt God.
(b) The turn into fire hydrants.
(c) The end up on Saturn.
(d) The kill each other.

5. What does Kate go find to help Thor with his injuries?
(a) Almond oil.
(b) A Band-aid.
(c) Antiseptic.
(d) Vaseline.

6. What store is closed for the night when Dirk looks for cigarettes?
(a) B.E. Bradley.
(b) H.W. Smith.
(c) 7-Eleven.
(d) Cross Wares.

7. What kind of firm does Clive Draycott belong to?
(a) A large firm of prosecutors.
(b) A good firm of city solicitors.
(c) A co-ed firm of public defenders.
(d) A bad firm of shady charlatans.

8. Where does the eagle injure Dirk as he tries to escape to get some cigarettes?
(a) On his right ear.
(b) On his nose.
(c) On his arm.
(d) On his leg.

9. What squeaks in protest as Dirk drives down the road in the rain in Chapter 19?
(a) His stress toy.
(b) A mouse in his seat.
(c) His wipers.
(d) His turn signal.

10. What does Dirk emphasize about his detective agency to the lawyer he hits with his car?
(a) That it is in the red.
(b) That it is in ruins.
(c) That it is honest.
(d) That it is holistic.

11. Why does Dirk think nobody will sell him cigarettes?
(a) Because it is raining.
(b) Because they aren't in the mood.
(c) Because he looks like a maniac.
(d) Because they are out fo stock.

12. To what conclusion does Dirk come in regards to Thor at the airport when he contemplates the gods roaming the earth?
(a) That he would have no passport.
(b) That he would have trouble in traffic.
(c) That music would mean nothing to him.
(d) That the gods could destroy the earth.

13. What creatures crouch beneath the foul sky outside the gates of Valhalla?
(a) Gorgons.
(b) Gargoyles.
(c) Dragons.
(d) Demons.

14. Where do Kate and Thor find themselves when they flick out of Asgard?
(a) Dirk's house.
(b) A bedroom suite in a hotel.
(c) Woodshead.
(d) A train station in the South of France.

15. On what type of bass does Neil play "The Ride of the Valkyries"?
(a) A Steinberger.
(b) An Epiphone.
(c) A Fender Precision.
(d) A Dean Edge.

Short Answer Questions

1. What is Tsuliwaensis about to do when Kate and Thor arrive in Asgard?

2. Where does Dirk decline offers that don't involve the procurement of cigarettes?

3. Who is the world's greatest publisher of the world's sleaziest newspaper?

4. What happens to a god that makes the god know he is dead?

5. Where did Dirk buy the Japanese print that is missing from his wall when the eagle comes into his house?

(see the answer keys)

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