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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What would amaze Bombeck about the game shows?
(a) The excitement of the winners.
(b) The game show host's cheesiness.
(c) The uniform beauty of the game show assistants.
(d) The women's knowledge.

2. What sort of shoes did Bombeck find particularly painful?
(a) Open-toed high heels.
(b) Gogo boots.
(c) Sandals.
(d) Platform shoes.

3. For how many meals did Bombeck's son claim to have capacity?
(a) Five.
(b) Seven.
(c) Six.
(d) Eight.

4. According to Bombeck, what was notable about using a shopping cart?
(a) Anyone could use one without qualifications.
(b) It was geared towards taller shoppers.
(c) A child still needed to be buckled into their seat.
(d) Once one begins to use a shopping cart, that person must then fill it up with groceries, necessary or not.

5. Where did Bombeck find the dried French fry in "Warning: Families May Be Dangerous To Your Health?"
(a) Her son's saxophone case.
(b) Her son's backpack.
(c) Her son's binder.
(d) Her son's shoestrings to his gym shoes.

6. For what reasons did Bombeck tear a strip of wallpaper down in "Warning: Families May Be Dangerous To Your Health?"
(a) She was afraid that she had accidentally covered a treasured wall drawing from her child.
(b) She could not find paper and needed to write a note for her son.
(c) She was growing tired of the pattern.
(d) She needed to find its match at the local hardware store.

7. Why did Bombeck dislike several fashion trends?
(a) They cheapened the fashion of an earlier decade.
(b) She was too short.
(c) They were mostly for teenagers.
(d) Her measurements are not proportional.

8. In Bombeck's imagined game show scenario, what would the woman initially win?
(a) An all-expenses paid vacation.
(b) A new car.
(c) A large sum of money.
(d) A set of furniture.

9. What did Bombeck cite as being a problem with "The Star Spangled Banner?"
(a) The song is too long.
(b) Too many people do not know the words.
(c) The melody could hurt nonprofessional singers.
(d) Too many people deviate from the melody when singing it before a ballgame.

10. Where did Bombeck feel particularly self-conscious in "Constitutionality of Drive-in Windows?"
(a) Pharmacies.
(b) Restaurants.
(c) Banks.
(d) Mailboxes.

11. From what months did Bombeck claim to always be cold?
(a) May until September.
(b) September until December.
(c) July until October.
(d) November until March.

12. In "Illegal Possession of Junk Food," what would Bombeck sell on a trial basis to trick kids into eating better?
(a) Fresh fruit.
(b) Fresh vegetables.
(c) Freshly baked cookies.
(d) Milkshakes.

13. What did Bombeck claim to do when she saw her daughter's ears were pierced?
(a) Cry.
(b) Faint.
(c) Scream.
(d) She grounded her daughter.

14. Which of the following is not a fad listed by Bombed as trends that she knew would soon go away?
(a) Pierced ears.
(b) High-waisted pants.
(c) Tube dress.
(d) Faux Asian apparel.

15. What was Bombeck unable to find when her son needed a particular object to return to school?
(a) Crayons.
(b) Paper.
(c) His health card.
(d) His birth certificate.

Short Answer Questions

1. What did Bombeck cite as something that should never be considered "an act of war?"

2. When must a game show contestant "stay on [their] feet?"

3. Who was Bombeck's son bringing home at the end of "How to Speak Child Fluently?"

4. At the end of "How to Speak Child Fluently," where had one of Bombeck's children crashed a car?

5. When "[staggering] the IRS men", what would a winning game show contestant be carrying?

(see the answer keys)

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