Chapter 11 Summary and Analysis

Didion reveals that she and Quintana feel the same way about their loss of memory, and uses the term "mudgy", a word coined by Quintana to describe how vague and unclear everything felt. Some details, however, are vivid, such as when she resisted a tracheotomy for Quintana, realizing in hindsight that her resistance was from profound denial. In Quintanta's case, the denial was masked with increasingly informed questions which she admits also made her feel less helpless.

Didion provides further descriptions of the medical knowledge she acquired while Quintana was in the hospital and how she continued to question the doctors. She was eventually left with no alternative but to wait. While waiting one day, she noticed the swimming pool near the hospital. This noticing, she writes, made her remember a disastrous attempt at decorating a swimming pool, which in turn...