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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What does Fred grin like at the end of the book?
(a) A little boy.
(b) An excited puppy.
(c) A Cheshire-cat.
(d) An assassin.

2. Who is the King of England in this time period?
(a) King Charles.
(b) King Henry.
(c) King George.
(d) King Philip.

3. What does the author say Ruby is plump like?
(a) A pudding.
(b) A peach.
(c) A pear.
(d) A jelly.

4. What does Lennox say he needs to take to the games?
(a) A scarf.
(b) A flask.
(c) Beer.
(d) Glasses.

5. What does the man tell the narrator to shut?
(a) His coat.
(b) His bag.
(c) His gob.
(d) His eyes.

6. How does the narrator say he would get to Glasgow?
(a) By hitch-hiking.
(b) By bike.
(c) By bus.
(d) By train.

7. What does the narrator say the goalkeeper turns into?
(a) A leaping ape.
(b) A long armed gorilla.
(c) A deranged eagle.
(d) A flying pig.

8. Who does the narrator see walk to the man's house?
(a) A policeman.
(b) The man's wife.
(c) A social worker.
(d) An ambulance driver.

9. What does the narrator say he would have done to Jim's mother if she has talked to him in the same way?
(a) Hugged her.
(b) Hit her.
(c) Screamed at her.
(d) Threw plates at her.

10. What is the top and back of Bert's head padded by?
(a) Overgrown hair.
(b) Fat.
(c) Hair transplants.
(d) Moles.

11. Who does Jim Scarfedale live with?
(a) His children.
(b) His mother.
(c) His brother.
(d) His sister.

12. What does Fred say ninety-five thousand quid has gone up like?
(a) Scotch mist.
(b) Arsenal defenders.
(c) Goal hangers.
(d) London fog.

13. What has Lennox's wife cooked for dinner?
(a) Kippers.
(b) Steak.
(c) Eggs and chips.
(d) Sardines.

14. What does the narrator say Jim's mother cannot touch Phylis with?
(a) A poker.
(b) A barge pole.
(c) A finger.
(d) A rope.

15. What does Fred say he is not one to grumble about?
(a) His job.
(b) His grub.
(c) His team.
(d) His wife.

Short Answer Questions

1. What does the narrator say you can't hold to forever?

2. What is Jim looking as miserable as when he returns?

3. What kind of stains does Bert have on his mac?

4. What does the man want the narrator to do when he has the rope around his neck?

5. What ride does Colin want to try?

(see the answer keys)

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