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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What is one of the 'neatest' ways to travel for free?
(a) Stowing away on ships.
(b) Biking.
(c) Walking.
(d) Hitchhiking.

2. According to Hoffman, what can few police officers read?
(a) A book without having to use a dictionary.
(b) The Constitution.
(c) A driver's license.
(d) English.

3. What type of suspension is preferable on a boxcar?
(a) Hydro-cushion.
(b) Pneumatic press.
(c) Thermo-coil.
(d) Torsion beam.

4. What should you leave for the waiter or waitress after stealing from a restaurant?
(a) A forged, blank check.
(b) A dead rat.
(c) A good tip.
(d) Nothing.

5. Who's Register of Companies, Directors and Executives does Hoffman recommend?
(a) Standard's.
(b) Smith's.
(c) Abbie's.
(d) Poor's.

6. What have 'yippies' been doing at supermarkets since their inception?
(a) Shoplifting.
(b) Working.
(c) Meeting with each other.
(d) Picking up girls.

7. What are 'springing up all over the New Nation?'
(a) Free Universities.
(b) Free Hospitals.
(c) Free Armories.
(d) Free Shops.

8. What is it important to do before 'pulling a big rip off' at a grocery store?
(a) Bottle it.
(b) Bag it.
(c) Case it.
(d) Box it.

9. What makes a pair of 'snappy casual shoes?'
(a) A black plastic bag.
(b) Cut-out sections of tire with inner tube.
(c) Skates with the blades removed.
(d) Bowling shoes.

10. What type of card is useful for people in their mid twenties?
(a) Get-out-of-jail-free card.
(b) Youth Card.
(c) International Student Card.
(d) Credit card.

11. What type of vehicle is easier to hitch a ride on at night?
(a) Train.
(b) Pickup truck.
(c) Boat.
(d) Bus.

12. What is the most effective foreign coin to use as a substitute for a quarter?
(a) Uruguayan 10 Centismo.
(b) Icelandic 5 Auran.
(c) Danish 5 Ore.
(d) Peruvian 20 Centavo.

13. What can you sew onto a t-shirt to aid in stealing?
(a) An anarchy symbol.
(b) A plastic bag.
(c) A health inspector's emblem.
(d) Psychedelic designs to draw attention away from your hands.

14. What number size of brass washer doubles as a dime?
(a) 14.
(b) 13.
(c) 12.
(d) 16.

15. How much money did the hijacker ask for when he 'got greedy?'
(a) One billion dollars.
(b) One million dollars.
(c) One hundred thousand dollars.
(d) One hundred million dollars.

Short Answer Questions

1. What should women never go grocery shopping without?

2. What should you do to all your cans before going to the cashier?

3. How much money in free phone calls was made from New York City in 1969?

4. What does Hoffman recommend against when hijacking the mic at a concert?

5. What can be used as fake marijuana?

(see the answer keys)

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