Summary

In “Themes and Variations,” while living in Chicago in 1984, Sedaris attended author events at the public library. He remembers feeling nervous when approaching the signing table. During one such event, the author was distracted and disregarded Sedaris. Because of this experience, he made the resolution as an author to “start the conversation immediately” when fans approach his signing table (106). One time, however, a woman started the conversation first, telling him that he had gotten her “to put [her] bra back on” (106). She clarified that no one could get her to leave her house after she had taken off her bra for the day. When Sedaris began mentioning the story at readings, he discovered that many women had a similar policy.

During most of his tours, “a theme will develop” (108). During one tour, the theme was jokes. Sedaris acquired innumerable...