U Po Kyin

U Po Kyin, born circa 1869, is a Subdivisional Magistrate of Kyauktada in Burma, at the time an English colony. The "U" in his name is an honorific. U Po Kyin is fifty-six years old and enormously fat—so fat, in fact, that he requires assistance to stand from a seated position. U Po Kyin views his own fatness as desirable and the metaphysical result of devouring the essence of the many people he has defeated in his climb to success. His complexion is yellow. Notwithstanding his girth, his skin is unwrinkled. He wears traditional Burmese dress and speaks Burmese, the local language, as well as English. He chews and spits betel, though his teeth are apparently clean and numerous. From the age of seventeen through twenty, Po Kyin worked in various bazaars doing odd jobs. At the age of twenty he received a large sum...