by Mark Steyn

About the author: Mark Steyn is a theater critic for the New Criterion,a magazine of cultural criticism, and a movie critic for the Spectator, a British political affairs magazine.

The State of New Hampshire doesn’t require much from its school districts—a mutually satisfactory arrangement about to be abruptly terminated due to an asinine Supreme Court decision declaring our entire education system unconstitutional.

But I digress. One of the few things the state does require of my small grade school and every other one is that they post signs on the road warning motorists they are now entering a “Drug-Free School Zone.”

It irks me. At board meetings, I’m tempted to stand up and demand we replace it with “You Are...