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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What is the effect Charleston has on Bryson?
(a) He feels like a kid again.
(b) He feels like his father would be proud of him.
(c) He feels like he stepped into a Pepsi commercial.
(d) He feels like he should give up and go home.

2. While visiting Abe Lincoln's home-town, Bryson quickly becomes ______.
(a) Afraid.
(b) Excited.
(c) Bored.
(d) Nostalgic.

3. Why does Bryson stop in Bryson City?
(a) It shares his name.
(b) It's where his parents got married.
(c) His brother lives there.
(d) He was named after it.

4. What prompted "Lost Continent"?
(a) His distaste for the U.S.
(b) Bryson's boredom with other countries.
(c) The death of Bryson's father.
(d) A very good offer from a publisher.

5. While in Columbus, what does Bryson realize about his journey?
(a) He can't ever go home again.
(b) He has more time than he needs.
(c) He will never find the perfect town.
(d) He doesn't care enough about America.

6. What does Bryson believe his grandparents would do while awaiting the family's arrival?
(a) Call all their friends.
(b) Argue.
(c) Wait outside the house for them.
(d) Knit.

7. Bryson feels that Columbus has pieces of _______.
(a) Perfection.
(b) History.
(c) Fantasy.
(d) His childhood.

8. Bryson says the three things that kill a farmer are: "lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and _____".
(a) Disease.
(b) Pyschos.
(c) Wild animals.
(d) Old age.

9. When a girl asks Bryson "kin I help yew," how does Bryson feel?
(a) Embarrassed for her.
(b) Like he's in danger.
(c) Like he's falling in love.
(d) Like he's in another country.

10. Where are the senior citizens visiting the "Little White House" from?
(a) Alabama.
(b) A Baptist church.
(c) A retirement home.
(d) A hospital.

11. Bryson decides he wants to travel after watching _________.
(a) A dog fight.
(b) A documentary.
(c) A soccer game.
(d) An old movie.

12. In a small town, Bryson always finds a business or two named ______.
(a) Chubby's.
(b) Java Jim's.
(c) Pete's.
(d) Vern's.

13. What does Bryson believe the youth of today is lacking?
(a) A good imagination.
(b) Parents to take them on vacations.
(c) The ability to be easily entertained.
(d) Good sights to see.

14. In contrast to Britain, Bryson finds that Iowa has ______ color.
(a) A lack of.
(b) A bland.
(c) Hysterical.
(d) Frightening.

15. The Dullard barmaid has "ready for sex written all over her face but better bring a _____ written all over her body."
(a) Paper bag.
(b) Bouquet of flowers.
(c) Fire extinguisher.
(d) Hamburger.

Short Answer Questions

1. What isn't allowed inside of the national park at Smokey Mountain?

2. What does Bryson say he, like all midwesterners, love?

3. Why is Bryson disappointed by Auburn, AL?

4. What does Bryson claim is good about Des Moines in comparison the rest of Iowa?

5. In Bryson's opinion, what don't farmers feel?

(see the answer keys)

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