Long time we smiled at these, and five hundred the like, that have now slipt my memory:  But now when Ascyltos, who could not moderate hirnself, held up his hands and laught at every thing; nay so downright, that he was ready to cry:  A free-man of Trimalchio’s that sate next above me, grew hot upon’t; and “What,” said he, “thou sheep, what dost thou laugh at? does not this sumptuousness of my master please you? you’re richer (forsooth) and eat better every day; so may the guardian of this place favour me, as had I sate near him, I’d hit him a box on the ear ere this:  A hopeful cullion, that mocks others; some pitiful night-walker, not worth the very urine he makes; and should I throw mine on him, knows not where to dry himself.  I am not (so help me Hercules) quickly angry, yet worms are bred even in tender flesh.  He laughs! what has he to laugh at? what wooll did his father give for the bantling?  Is he a Roman knight?  I am the son of a king.  How came I then, you’ll say, to serve another?  I did it of my self, and had rather be a citizen of Rome, than a tributary king, and now hope to live so, as to be no man’s jeast.  I walk like other men, with an open face, and can shew my head among the best, for I owe no man a groat; I never had an action brought against me, or said to me on the exchange, Pay me what thou owest me.  I bought some acres in the country, and have everything suitable to it:  I feed twenty mouths, besides dogs:  I ransomed my bond-woman, lest another should wipe his hands on her smock; and between our selves, she cost me more than I’ll tell ye at present.  I was made a captain of horse gratis, and hope so to die, that I shall have no occasion to blush in my grave:  But art thou so prying into others, that thou never considerest thy self?  Canst thou spy a louse on another man’s coat, and not see the tyck on thy own?  Your master then is ancienter than your self, and ’t please him; but yet thou, whose milk is not yet out of thy nose; that can’st not say boh to a goose; must you be making observations?  Are you the wealthier man?  If you are, dine twice, and sup twice; for my part, I value my credit more than treasures:  Upon the whole matter, where’s the man that ever dunn’d me twice?  Thou pipkin of a man, more limber, but nothing better than a strap of wet leather, I have served forty years in this house, came into it with my hair full grown; this palace was not then built, yet I made it my business to please my master, a person of honour, the parings of whose nails are more worth than thy whole body.  I met several rubs in my way, but by the help of my good angel, I broke through them all:  This is truth; it is as easie to make a hunting-horn of a sow’s tail, as to get into this company.  What make ye in a dump now, like a goat at a heap of stones?”