Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1751 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 132 pages of information about Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1751.

Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1751 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 132 pages of information about Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1751.

For example, if you read in the morning some of La Rochefoucault’s maxims; consider them, examine them well, and compare them with the real characters you meet with in the evening.  Read La Bruyere in the morning, and see in the evening whether his pictures are like.  Study the heart and the mind of man, and begin with your own.  Meditation and reflection must lay the foundation of that knowledge:  but experience and practice must, and alone can, complete it.  Books, it is true, point out the operations of the mind, the sentiments of the heart, the influence of the passions; and so far they are of previous use:  but without subsequent practice, experience, and observation, they are as ineffectual, and would even lead you into as many errors in fact, as a map would do, if you were to take your notions of the towns and provinces from their delineations in it.  A man would reap very little benefit by his travels, if he made them only in his closet upon a map of the whole world.  Next to the two books that I have already mentioned, I do not know a better for you to read, and seriously reflect upon, than ’Avis d’une Mere d’un Fils, par la Marquise de Lambert’.  She was a woman of a superior understanding and knowledge of the world, had always kept the best company, was solicitous that her son should make a figure and a fortune in the world, and knew better than anybody how to point out the means.  It is very short, and will take you much less time to read, than you ought to employ in reflecting upon it, after you have read it.  Her son was in the army, she wished he might rise there; but she well knew, that, in order to rise, he must first please:  she says to him, therefore, With regard to those upon whom you depend, the chief merit is to please.  And, in another place, in subaltern employments, the art of pleasing must be your support.  Masters are like mistresses:  whatever services they may be indebted to you for, they cease to love when you cease to be agreeable.  This, I can assure you, is at least as true in courts as in camps, and possibly more so.  If to your merit and knowledge you add the art of pleasing, you may very probably come in time to be Secretary of State; but, take my word for it, twice your merit and knowledge, without the art of pleasing, would, at most, raise you to the important post of Resident at Hamburgh or Ratisbon.  I need not tell you now, for I often have, and your own discernment must have told you, of what numberless little ingredients that art of pleasing is compounded, and how the want of the least of them lowers the whole; but the principal ingredient is, undoubtedly, ’la douceur dans le manieres’:  nothing will give you this more than keeping company with your superiors.  Madame Lambert tells her son, Let your connections be with people above you; by that means you will acquire a habit of respect and politeness.  With one’s equals, one is apt to become negligent, and the mind grows torpid.  She advises him, too, to frequent

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Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1751 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.