Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1749 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 167 pages of information about Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1749.

Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1749 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 167 pages of information about Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1749.

Dear boy:  There is a natural good-breeding which occurs to every man of common sense, and is practiced by every man, of common good-nature.  This good-breeding is general, independent of modes, and consists in endeavors to please and oblige our fellow-creatures by all good offices, short of moral duties.  This will be practiced by a good-natured American savage, as essentially as by the best-bred European.  But then, I do not take it to extend to the sacrifice of our own conveniences, for the sake of other people’s.  Utility introduced this sort of good-breeding as it introduced commerce; and established a truck of the little ‘agremens’ and pleasures of life.  I sacrifice such a conveniency to you, you sacrifice another to me; this commerce circulates, and every individual finds his account in it upon the whole.  The third sort of good-breeding is local, and is variously modified, in not only different countries, but in different towns of the same country.  But it must be founded upon the two former sorts; they are the matter to which, in this case, fashion and custom only give the different shapes and impressions.  Whoever has the two first sorts will easily acquire this third sort of good-breeding, which depends singly upon attention and observation.  It is, properly, the polish, the lustre, the last finishing stroke of good-breeding.  It is to be found only in capitals, and even there it varies; the good-breeding of Rome differing, in some things, from that of Paris; that of Paris, in others, from that of Madrid; and that of Madrid, in many things, from that of London.  A man of sense, therefore, carefully attends to the local manners of the respective places where he is, and takes for his models those persons whom he observes to be at the head of fashion and good-breeding.  He watches how they address themselves to their superiors, how they accost their equals, and how they treat their inferiors; and lets none of those little niceties escape him which are to good-breeding what the last delicate and masterly touches are to a good picture; and of which the vulgar have no notion, but by which good judges distinguish the master.  He attends even to their air, dress, and motions, and imitates them, liberally, and not servilely; he copies, but does not mimic.  These personal graces are of very great consequence.  They anticipate the sentiments, before merit can engage the understanding; they captivate the heart, and give rise, I believe, to the extravagant notions of charms and philters.  Their effects were so surprising, that they were reckoned supernatural.  The most graceful and best-bred men, and the handsomest and genteelest women, give the most philters; and, as I verily believe, without the least assistance of the devil.  Pray be not only well dressed, but shining in your dress; let it have ‘du brillant’.  I do not mean by a clumsy load of gold and silver, but by the taste and fashion of it.  The women like and require it; they think it an attention due

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Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman, 1749 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.