When my young Gallant was gone, I began to consider that I had all I was like to have of ’em:  and that one Fool was enough to be troubled with; and since they had paid me but one half of my Salary, and for that one of ’em had enjoy’d me, & had what he wanted, I tho’ we were pretty even.  And so getting up Early the next Morning, I left at once my Lodgings and Gallants.  And at night when the other came, (as without Doubt he did instead of Meeting with me,) I left him this Note in the Key-hole,

For your small Stipend, I’ll ne’er liv in Goal, Go seek a Trull that can divide her Tayl: One half I’ve Pleas’d, I one half am Paid: Had I got all, I shou’d have longer Staid. And yet you cann’t say I was Ungenteel, For I let one Kiss_ and the other Feel._

How pleas’d the disappointed Fop was with my Poetry, I know not; for I ne’er went again to my New Lodging to enquire after ’em.

Well, said the Goldsmiths Lady, I ne’er heard of a prettier Intrigue before and I dare say you serv’d ’em very handsomely.—­But pray proceed.

Another time, I serv’d a Goldsmith’s Prentice a pretty Trick; For having been abroad about some business, and coming home i’th’ evening, a young Spark, exceeding Beauish, (with a New Modish Suit of Cloaths on) that had been drinking hard all Day, would need be picking of me up, when I did’nt at all intend it.  But seeing him so earnest for a Bout, that I cou’d’nt get rid of him, I had him to a House I was acquainted with by th’ way, and there after a heartening Cup or two, and having handled his Posteriours, to see he didn’t put a Trick upon me, I let him have what he so eagerly desir’d; and diving into his Pockets i’th’ mean while, I found he had but one poor single Shilling left; which vext me so, that I resolv’d I wou’d be even with him another way; and therefore when he had done what he’d a mind to do, I presently call’d briskly for a fresh Bottle of the Best, which whilst we were drinking, I said Well, Spark, as a Reward for your excellent Performance, which has been beyond my Expectation, and shew’d you to be a good Womans Man, I will divert you with an Entertainment worth your Seeing.  Come, it shall cost you nothing; only I must beg the Favour of you to unrig, and lend me your Cloaths for half an hour; and I will bring you a Mant and Petticoat to wear the while; and you shall see a Jolly Crew of Active Dames, which will perform such Leacherous Agilities as will stir you up to take the other Touch, and far out-vie whatever has been either done, or related to be done, by Madam Creswel_, Posture Moll, the Countess of Alsatia, or any other German Rope-dancer whatever._ The Spark was extreamly tickled with the Fancy, and presently uncas’d himself; and gave me all his Bravery, and was so over-forward, that he not only gave me his Cloaths, but his Rings, Cane, and Hat, and Wig; so that he left hinself nothing