206.  But, now, all this supposes, that the husband has well and truly acted his part!  It supposes, not only that he has been faithful; but, that he has not, in any way, been the cause of temptation to the wife to be unfaithful.  If he have been cold and neglectful; if he have led a life of irregularity; if he have proved to her that home was not his delight; if he have made his house the place of resort for loose companions; if he have given rise to a taste for visiting, junketting, parties of pleasure and gaiety; if he have introduced the habit of indulging in what are called ‘innocent freedoms;’ if these, or any of these, the fault is his, he must take the consequences, and he has no right to inflict punishment on the offender, the offence being in fact of his own creating.  The laws of God, as well as the laws of man, have given him all power in this respect:  it is for him to use that power for the honour of his wife as well as for that of himself:  if he neglect to use it, all the consequences ought to fall on him; and, as far as my observation has gone, in nineteen out of twenty cases of infidelity in wives, the crimes have been fairly ascribable to the husbands.  Folly or misconduct in the husband, cannot, indeed, justify or even palliate infidelity in the wife, whose very nature ought to make her recoil at the thought of the offence; but it may, at the same time, deprive him of the right of inflicting punishment on her:  her kindred, her children, and the world, will justly hold her in abhorrence; but the husband must hold his peace.

207. ‘Innocent freedoms!’ I know of none that a wife can indulge in.  The words, as applied to the demeanour of a married woman, or even a single one, imply a contradiction.  For freedom, thus used, means an exemption or departure from the strict rules of female reserve; and, I do not see how this can be innocent.  It may not amount to crime, indeed; but, still it is not innocent; and the use of the phrase is dangerous.  If it had been my fortune to be yoked to a person, who liked ‘innocent freedoms,’ I should have unyoked myself in a very short time.  But, to say the truth, it is all a man’s own fault.  If he have not sense and influence enough to prevent ‘innocent freedoms,’ even before marriage, he will do well to let the thing alone, and leave wives to be managed by those who have.  But, men will talk to your wife, and natter her.  To be sure they will, if she be young and pretty; and would you go and pull her away from them?  O no, by no means; but you must have very little sense, or must have made very little use of it, if her manner do not soon convince them that they employ their flattery in vain.