White buckskin gloves are the smartest, but gray suede are the most conventional.  White kid is worn only in the evening.  It is even becoming the fashion for ushers at small country weddings not to wear gloves at all!  But at every wedding, great or small, city or country, etiquette demands that the groom, best man, and ushers, all wear high silk hats, and that the groom carry a walking stick.

Very particular grooms have the soles of their shoes blacked with “water-proof” shoe polish so that when they kneel, their shoes look dark and neat.

=WHAT THE BEST MAN WEARS=

The best man wears precisely what the groom wears, with only one small exception:  the groom’s boutonniere is slightly different and more elaborate.  The groom and best man often wear ties that are different from those worn by the ushers, and occasionally white waistcoats.  Otherwise the two principal men are dressed like the ushers.

=WHAT THE USHERS WEAR=

It is of greatest importance that in dress each usher be an exact counterpart of his fellows, if the picture is to be perfect.

Everyone knows what a ragged-edged appearance is produced by a company of recruits whose uniforms are odd lots.  An after-effect of army training was evident at one or two smart New York weddings where the grooms were in each case ex-officers and their ushers turned out in military uniformity.  Each of these grooms sent typewritten instructions to his ushers, covering every detail of the “equipment” exacted.  Few people may have reasoned why, but scarcely any one failed to notice “what smart looking men all the ushers were.”  It is always just such attention to detail that produces a perfectly finished result.  The directions sent by one of the grooms was as follows: 

    “Wedding rehearsal on Tuesday, St. Bartholomew’s at 5 P.M.

    Wedding on Wednesday at 4 P.M.

    Please wear: 

Black calfskin low shoes.  Plain black silk socks.  Gray striped trousers (the darkest you have).  Morning coat and single-breasted black waistcoat.  White dress shirt (see that cuffs show three-quarters of an inch below coat sleeves).  Stand-up wing collar.  Tie and gloves are enclosed.  Boutonniere will be at the church.  Be at the church yourself at three o’clock, sharp.”

=THE HEAD USHER=

Usually there is no “head usher,” but in certain localities courtesy designates the usher who is selected to take the bride’s mother up the aisle as the “head,” or “first” usher.

Very occasionally, too, a nervous groom appoints an especially “reliable” friend head usher so as to be sure that all details will be carried out—­including the prompt and proper appearance at the church of the other ushers.  Usually, the ushers divide the arrangements among themselves.  The groom decides who goes on which aisle.  One of them volunteers or is asked to look out for the bride’s coming and to notify the groom, another is especially detailed to take the two mothers up the aisle.  But very often this arrangement is arbitrarily decided by height.  If one mother is very tall and the other very short, they generally go up with different ushers, the tallest being chosen for the taller lady, and one of medium height for the shorter.