50.  Be careful not to appear dark and mysterious, lest you should be thought suspicious; than which, there cannot be a more unamiable character.  If you appear mysterious and reserved, others will be truly so with you:  and in this case, there is an end to improvement, for you will gather no information.  Be reserved, but never seem so.

51.  There is a fault extremely common with some people, which I would have you avoid.  When their opinion is asked upon any subject, they will give it with so apparent a diffidence and timidity, that one cannot, without the utmost pain, listen to them; especially if they are known to be men of universal knowledge.  “Your Lordship will pardon me,” says one of this stamp, “if I should not be able to speak to the case in hand, so well as it might be wished.”—­“I’ll venture to speak of this matter to the best of my poor abilities and dullness of apprehension.”—­“I fear I shall expose myself, but in obedience to your Lordship’s commands,”—­and while they are making these apologies, they interrupt the business and tire the company.

52.  Always look people in the face when you speak to them, otherwise you will be thought conscious of some guilt; besides, you lose the opportunity of reading their countenances; from which you will much better learn the impression your discourse makes upon them, than you can possibly do from their words; for words are at the will of every one, but the countenance is frequently involuntary.

53.  If, in speaking to a person, you are not heard, and should be desired to repeat what you said, do not raise your voice in the repetition, lest you should be thought angry, on being obliged to repeat what you had said before; it was probably owing to the hearer’s inattention.

54.  One word only, as to swearing.  Those who addict themselves to it, and interlard their discourse with oaths, can never be considered as gentlemen; they are generally people of low education, and are unwelcome in what is called good company.  It is a vice that has no temptation to plead, but is, in every respect, as vulgar as it is wicked.

55.  Never accustom yourself to scandal, nor listen to it; for though it may gratify the malevolence of some people, nine times out of ten it is attended with great disadvantages.  The very person you tell it to, will, on reflection, entertain a mean opinion of you, and it will often bring you into a very disagreeable situation.  And as there would be no evil-speakers, if there were no evil-hearers; it is in scandal as in robbery; the receiver is as bad as the thief.  Besides, it will lead people to shun your company, supposing that you would speak ill of them to the next acquaintance you meet.

56.  Carefully avoid talking either of your own or other people’s domestic concerns.  By doing the one you will be thought vain; by entering into the other, you will be considered as officious.  Talking of yourself is an impertinence to the company; your affairs are nothing to them; besides, they cannot be kept too secret.  And as to the affairs of others, what are they to you?  In talking of matters that no way concern you, you are liable to commit blunders, and, should you touch any one in a sore part, you may possibly lose his esteem.  Let your conversation, then, in mixed companies, always be general.