The Tenth Triennial Handel Festival.  Programme extends over three days, Monday, to-day the 24th, and Friday the 26th.  The singers are Madame ALBANI, Miss MARIAN MCKENZIE, Messrs. SANTLEY, EDWARD LLOYD, BARTON MCGUCKIN, BRIDSON, and BRERETON—­the last pair seeming to come in like the “two pretty men” of nursery history, ’yclept “ROBIN and RICHARD.”  The great organ cannot be played without EYRE and bellows.  The Conductor to the musical omnibus is AUGUST MANNS, or more appropriately, JUNE MANNS. Motto.—­“MANNS wants but little here below, but he wants that uncommonly good”—­and more than good it is safe to be in the hands of the Conductor whose name is indicative of quantity and quality. Salvete, Homines!

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OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

The Baron is getting along with GEORGE MEREDITH’s One of Our Conquerors.  Within the last three weeks he has already reached p. 94 of Vol.  I, and here the weather, having suddenly become tropical, the Baron felt that his mighty brain “whirled, swam to a giddiness, and subsided.”  He has been stopped occasionally en route; he had come into view of “the diminutive marble cavalier of the infantile cerebellum.”  Then he retraced his steps, puzzled a bit, but after a “modest quencher” Swivellerian libation, he hit upon a luminous passage which warned him “in plain speech”—­and whose is plainer than GEORGE MEREDITH’s?—­“that the Bacchus of auspicious birth induces ever to the worship of the loftier Deities.” Excellent i’ faith!  And then the Baron smole, as one who is interiorly enlightened smileth as he read, “Forbear to come hauling up examples of malarious men”—­("‘malarious men’ is good,” quoth the Baron)—­“in whom these pourings of the golden rays of life breed fogs; and be moved, since you are scarcely under an obligation to hunt the meaning”—­(here the Baron wondered within himself.  Was he under an obligation or not?  In foro conscientiae the case was set down for that immortal date. “To-morrow")—­“in tolerance of some dithyrambic inebriety of narration (quiverings of the reverent pen) when we find ourselves entering the circle of a most magnetic popularity.” Here the Baron paused.  Somehow, in his search after truth, he had fallen down some seventy pages, and was on his back again at p. 33, Vol.  I. Refreshment was necessary.  Iced.  Also a Nicotinian sacrifice, as of primitive days, when heifers, adorned, not altars, but weeds, vegetables, and early produce only. Smokeamus!  Veni, vidi, visky! ’Fore GEORGE!  Your health and novel!

THE BARON DE BOOK-WORMS.

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“AS EASY AS ABC.”

Witness of the Labour Commission (under examination).  Yes, I think that employers should be forced by law to give in to their men.

Question.  But should this lead to bankruptcy, what then?