I fancy he is), he would have obtained immediate relief by taking ——­’s ——.  But leaving medical subjects out of the question, there are other gloomy pictures—­besides patients, heaps of prisoners, and lots of paupers.  Fortunately, most of these last are “skied,” which is a blessing!  I hear that the Academicians have bought Mr. CALDERON’s picture out of the Chantrey Bequest.  So selfish to deprive the public of the chance!  However, as the subject is a little risque, perhaps it is just as well that it should be buried in the Diploma Gallery.

The usual gaiety last week.  Mrs. PARAGRAPH PRESSCUTTERBY gave a magnificent Ball at ——­ Square.  The whole of the garden was covered in by Messrs. ——­, of ——­ Street, and the massed Bands of the Cavalry Brigade at ——­ supplied the Music.  The supper (furnished by Messrs. ——­, of ——­ Street), was served in the Lawn Cricket Saloon, and the gigantic apartment was crammed the whole evening.  I know you like recipes.  I extract the following from ——­’s Guide to Grub, a capital brochure published at a shilling.

“Pick, wash (in plenty of water), and drain 2 lbs. of crab-shells without bruising them.  Pare and core some well shaped apples.  When these are well heated, add the spinach.  Cut into neat slices a dish of lamb’s fry, and fry it a nice brown in the bacon liquor.  Boil all together till the syrup is reduced to half the quantity, then lay the lemon peel on the apples, and pour the syrup over them.”

It is a Russian dish, and is called Boeoesh.  You must tell me what you think of it.  Ever your most loving friend, SYLLIE.

[Footnote 1:  Names and addresses of tradespeople, &c., editorially suppressed until arrangements have been completed in the Advertisement Department.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “PEACE.”

STATUE OF THE RIGHT HON.  ARTHUR GOLFOUR.

(Out of the Academy.)]

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ROBERT AT THE DARBY.

By sum strange cohincidence as I ain’t the least abel to account for, the annual buthday of my much better half fell this year on the grate Darby Day! and so we both agreed as weed have one more jolly happy day together, ewen if so be as we never had another.  So off I sets, and I takes two box seats houtside a homnibus and four spanking Bays, I think they calls ’em, coz they was such a butiful dark brown colour, and for which I paid no less than 12s. 6d. a peace, and with our pockets pretty well stuffed full of sanwiches, and jest a nice little flarsk of summut nice, never mind what, off we sets for the City at nine a clock, hay hem, and at nine forty by the church clock off we starts on our perrylus journey, reddy, as the Poet says, to dash through thick and thin.