[5043] “Bis puer effoeto quamvis balbutiat ore,
        Prima legit rarae tam culta roseta puellae,”

that is rheumatic and gouty, hath some twenty diseases, perhaps but one eye, one leg, never a nose, no hair on his head, wit in his brains, nor honesty, if he have land or [5044]money, she will have him before all other suitors, [5045]_Dummodo sit dives barbarus ille placet_.  “If he be rich, he is the man,” a fine man, and a proper man, she will go to Jacaktres or Tidore with him; Galesimus de monte aureo.  Sir Giles Goosecap, Sir Amorous La-Fool, shall have her.  And as Philemasium in [5046] Aristaenetus told Emmusus, absque argento omnia vana, hang him that hath no money, “’tis to no purpose to talk of marriage without means,” [5047] trouble me not with such motions; let others do as they will, “I’ll be sure to have one shall maintain me fine and brave.”  Most are of her mind, [5048] De moribus ultima fiet questio, for his conditions, she shall inquire after them another time, or when all is done, the match made, and everybody gone home. [5049]Lucian’s Lycia was a proper young maid, and had many fine gentlemen to her suitors; Ethecles, a senator’s son, Melissus, a merchant, &c.; but she forsook them all for one Passius, a base, hirsute, bald-pated knave; but why was it?  “His father lately died and left him sole heir of his goods and lands.”  This is not amongst your dust-worms alone, poor snakes that will prostitute their souls for money, but with this bait you may catch our most potent, puissant, and illustrious princes.  That proud upstart domineering Bishop of Ely, in the time of Richard the First, viceroy in his absence, as [5050]Nubergensis relates it, to fortify himself, and maintain his greatness, propinquarum suarum connubiis, plurimos sibi potentes et nobiles devincire curavit, married his poor kinswomen (which came forth of Normandy by droves) to the chiefest nobles of the land, and they were glad to accept of such matches, fair or foul, for themselves, their sons, nephews, &c. Et quis tam praeclaram aflinitatem sub spe magnae promotionis non optaret?  Who would not have done as much for money and preferment? as mine author [5051]adds.  Vortiger, King of Britain, married Rowena the daughter of Hengist the Saxon prince, his mortal enemy; but wherefore? she had Kent for her dowry.  Iagello the great Duke of Lithuania, 1386, was mightily enamoured on Hedenga, insomuch that he turned Christian from a Pagan, and was baptised himself by the name of Uladislaus, and all his subjects for her sake:  but why was it? she was daughter and heir of Poland, and his desire was to have both kingdoms incorporated into one.  Charles the Great was an earnest suitor to Irene the Empress, but, saith [5052]Zonarus, ob regnum, to annex the empire of the East to that of the West.  Yet what is the event of all such matches, that are so made for money, goods, by deceit, or for burning lust, quos foeda libido conjunxit, what follows?