Title:  Biltmore Oswald The Diary of a Hapless Recruit

Author:  J. Thorne Smith, Jr.

Release Date:  September 3, 2005 [EBook #16634]

Language:  English

Character set encoding:  ASCII

*** Start of this project gutenberg EBOOK Biltmore Oswald ***

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BILTMORE OSWALD

THE DIARY OF A HAPLESS RECRUIT

BY

J. Thorne Smith, Jr. 
U.S.N.R.F.

WITH 31 ILLUSTRATIONS IN BLACK-AND-WHITE

BY

Richard Dorgan
("Dick Dorgan”)
U.S.N.R.F.

[Illustration]

NEW YORK

FREDERICK A. STOKES COMPANY

PUBLISHERS

Copyright, 1918, by

Frederick A. Stokes Company All Rights Reserved

Reprinted from
the broadside
A journal for
the Naval Reserve force

DEDICATION

To my buddies, an unscrupulous, clamorous crew of pirates, as loyal and generous a lot as ever returned a borrowed dress jumper with dirty tapes; to numerous jimmy-legs and P.O.’s whose cantankerous tempers have furnished me with much material for this book; and also to a dog, an admirable dog whom I choose to call Mr. Fogerty, with apologies to this dog if in these pages his slave has unwittingly maligned his character or in any way cast suspicion upon his moral integrity.

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS

     “Biltmore Oswald” Frontispiece

     “‘Do you enlist for foreign service?’ he snapped.  ‘Sure,’ I
     replied, ‘it will all be foreign to me’” 2

     “The departure was moist” 3

     “Hospital apprentice treated me to a shot of Pelham ‘hop’” 4

     “I feel like a masquerade” 5

     “This, I thought, was adding insult to injury” 6

     “Mother kept screaming through the wire about my underwear” 7

     “A bill from a restaurant for $18.00 worth of past luncheons” 8

     “He missed the dirty whites, but I will never be the same” 9

     “Fire drill” 10

     “This is designed to give us physical poise” 11

     “Liberty Party” 14

     “Of course I played the game no more” 20