think for the disturbance; and as long as it held out
there was not a watch in the land that stood any chance
against it. But the rest of the day it would
keep on slowing down and fooling along until all the
clocks it had left behind caught up again. So
at last, at the end of twenty-four hours, it would
trot up to the judges’ stand all right and just
in time. It would show a fair and square average,
and no man could say it had done more or less than
its duty. But a correct average is only a mild
virtue in a watch, and I took this instrument to another
watchmaker. He said the king-bolt was broken.
I said I was glad it was nothing more serious.
To tell the plain truth, I had no idea what the king-bolt
was, but I did not choose to appear ignorant to a stranger.
He repaired the king-bolt, but what the watch gained
in one way it lost in another. It would run
awhile and then stop awhile, and then run awhile again,
and so on, using its own discretion about the intervals.
And every time it went off it kicked back like a musket.
I padded my breast for a few days, but finally took
the watch to another watchmaker. He picked it
all to pieces, and turned the ruin over and over under
his glass; and then he said there appeared to be something
the matter with the hair-trigger. He fixed it,
and gave it a fresh start. It did well now,
except that always at ten minutes to ten the hands
would shut together like a pair of scissors, and from
that time forth they would travel together.
The oldest man in the world could not make head or
tail of the time of day by such a watch, and so I
went again to have the thing repaired. This
person said that the crystal had got bent, and that
the mainspring was not straight. He also remarked
that part of the works needed half-soling. He
made these things all right, and then my timepiece
performed unexceptionably, save that now and then,
after working along quietly for nearly eight hours,
everything inside would let go all of a sudden and
begin to buzz like a bee, and the hands would straightway
begin to spin round and round so fast that their individuality
was lost completely, and they simply seemed a delicate
spider’s web over the face of the watch.
She would reel off the next twenty-four hours in
six or seven minutes, and then stop with a bang.
I went with a heavy heart to one more watchmaker, and
looked on while he took her to pieces. Then
I prepared to cross-question him rigidly, for this
thing was getting serious. The watch had cost
two hundred dollars originally, and I seemed to have
paid out two or three thousand for repairs.
While I waited and looked on I presently recognized
in this watchmaker an old acquaintance—a
steamboat engineer of other days, and not a good engineer,
either. He examined all the parts carefully,
just as the other watchmakers had done, and then delivered
his verdict with the same confidence of manner.
He said:
“She makes too much steam-you want to hang the monkey-wrench on the safety-valve!”