Tartarin De Tarascon eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 92 pages of information about Tartarin De Tarascon.

Tartarin De Tarascon eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 92 pages of information about Tartarin De Tarascon.

“Et autrement, have you heard the latest, au moins?”

“Et autrement, what now, is Tartarin going, au moins?” For in Tarascon every remark begins with “Et autrement” which is pronounced “autremain” and ends with “au moins” which is pronounced “au mouain” and in these days the sound of “autremain” and “au mouain” was enough to rattle the windows.

The most surprised person in the town to hear that he was leaving for Africa was Tartarin, but now see the effects of vanity.  Instead of replying that he was not going and had never intended to go, poor Tartarin, on the first occasion that the subject was broached adopted a somewhat evasive air, “He!...  He!... perhaps...  I can’t say.”  On the second occasion, now a little more accustomed to the idea, he replied “Probably” and on the third “Yes, definitely.”

Eventually, one evening at the club, carried away by some glasses of egg-nog, the public interest and the plaudits, he declared formally that he was tired of shooting at hats and was going shortly in pursuit of the great lions of Africa.

A loud cheer greeted this declaration, then came more egg-nog, handshakes, embraces and torchlight serenades until midnight before the little house of the baobab.

Tartarin-Sancho, however, was far from pleased.  The idea of travelling to Africa and hunting lions scared him stiff and when they went into the house, and while the serenade of honour was still going on outside, he made the most frightful scene with Tartarin-Quixote, calling him a crazy dreamer, a rash triple idiot and detailing one by one the catastrophes which would await him on such an expedition.  Shipwreck, fever, dysentery, plague, elephantiasis and so on... it was useless for Tartarin-Quixote to swear that he would be careful, that he would dress warmly, that he would take with him everything that might be needed, Tartarin-Sancho refused to listen.  The poor fellow saw himself already torn to pieces by lions or swallowed up in the sands of the desert, and the other Tartarin could pacify him only a little by pointing out that these were plans for the future, that there was no hurry, that they had not yet actually started.

Obviously one cannot embark on such an expedition without some preparation.  One cannot take off like a bird.  As a first measure Tartarin set about reading the reports of the great African explorers, the journals of Livingstone, Burton, Caille, and the like, there he saw that those intrepid travellers, before they put their boots on for these distant excursions, prepared themselves in advance to undergo hunger, thirst, long treks and privations of all sorts.

Tartarin decided to follow their example and took to a diet of “Eau bouillie”.  What is called eau bouillie in Tarascon consists of several slices of bread soaked in warm water, with a clove of garlic, a little thyme and a bay leaf.  It is not very palatable and you may imagine how Tartarin-Sancho enjoyed it.

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Tartarin De Tarascon from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.