that I stood upon the principle of the thing.  Business is business, and should be done in a business way.  There was no system whatever in swindling me out of a penny —­ a clear fraud of fifty per cent —­ no method in any respect.  I left at once the employment of Messrs. Cut & Comeagain, and set up in the Eye-Sore line by myself —­ one of the most lucrative, respectable, and independent of the ordinary occupations.

My strict integrity, economy, and rigorous business habits, here again came into play.  I found myself driving a flourishing trade, and soon became a marked man upon ’Change.  The truth is, I never dabbled in flashy matters, but jogged on in the good old sober routine of the calling —­ a calling in which I should, no doubt, have remained to the present hour, but for a little accident which happened to me in the prosecution of one of the usual business operations of the profession.  Whenever a rich old hunks or prodigal heir or bankrupt corporation gets into the notion of putting up a palace, there is no such thing in the world as stopping either of them, and this every intelligent person knows.  The fact in question is indeed the basis of the Eye-Sore trade.  As soon, therefore, as a building-project is fairly afoot by one of these parties, we merchants secure a nice corner of the lot in contemplation, or a prime little situation just adjoining, or tight in front.  This done, we wait until the palace is half-way up, and then we pay some tasty architect to run us up an ornamental mud hovel, right against it; or a Down-East or Dutch Pagoda, or a pig-sty, or an ingenious little bit of fancy work, either Esquimau, Kickapoo, or Hottentot.  Of course we can’t afford to take these structures down under a bonus of five hundred per cent upon the prime cost of our lot and plaster.  Can we?  I ask the question.  I ask it of business men.  It would be irrational to suppose that we can.  And yet there was a rascally corporation which asked me to do this very thing —­ this very thing!  I did not reply to their absurd proposition, of course; but I felt it a duty to go that same night, and lamp-black the whole of their palace.  For this the unreasonable villains clapped me into jail; and the gentlemen of the Eye-Sore trade could not well avoid cutting my connection when I came out.

The Assault-and-Battery business, into which I was now forced to adventure for a livelihood, was somewhat ill-adapted to the delicate nature of my constitution; but I went to work in it with a good heart, and found my account here, as heretofore, in those stern habits of methodical accuracy which had been thumped into me by that delightful old nurse —­ I would indeed be the basest of men not to remember her well in my will.  By observing, as I say, the strictest system in all my dealings, and keeping a well-regulated set of books, I was enabled to get over many serious difficulties, and, in the end, to establish myself very decently in the profession.  The truth is, that few individuals, in any line, did a snugger little business than I. I will just copy a page or so out of my Day-Book; and this will save me the necessity of blowing my own trumpet —­ a contemptible practice of which no high-minded man will be guilty.  Now, the Day-Book is a thing that don’t lie.