“Aw should think yo’ve a gooid nooation whear aw am,” sed Jack, “aw’ve managed th’ job, soa nah aw’m comin up; luk aght an’ give me a lift.”  As sooin as his heead wor within th’ raich ov his uncle’s fist, he collared hold ov his toppin, an niver let goa agean wol he stood o’ safe graand.  “By gow, Jack, tha’s given me a shock; awst be some time afoor aw get ovver this; tha owt to manage better nor soa; it’s like as if ivery thing tha touches tha maks a mess on it.”

“That’s reight, uncle, lig it o’ me!  But aw wonder whether yo or me gate th’ mooast ov a shock.  Aw should fancy it wor me.”

“Well, reight enuff, lad, it wor’nt a nice place to be in, an’ that suit o’ clooas ’ll niver be fit to be seen agean.”

“Noa, aw dooant think they will,” sed Jack; “but it mud ha’ been war, for they arn’t mine.”

“Why, whoa’s are they? aw thowt as tha coom up ’at tha luk’d varry respectable.”

“Aw dooant know whoa’s ther reightful owner, uncle, but mi hont has lent ‘em me to put on wol mine gate dried, for, yo know, aw’ve been i’th’ swill-tub once today.”

“Why, then, that’s my best Sundy suit ’at tha’s gooan an spoiled! aw wonder ’at thi hont had noa moor sense nor to leean ’em to thee.”

“Aw wonder aw’d noa moor sense nor to goa daan that well to spoil ’em, for it’s nooan a nice hoil to be in, an’ when aw’ve a shaar-bath, aw’d rayther have it withaat onybody’s clooas.”

“Well, let’s lig away, an’ get hooam as fast as we can, for thi hont’ll mak a noise aw’ll bet, soa we mud as weel get it ovver as sooin as possible.”

They went hooam an’ tuk th’ uncle’s dinner back wi ’em, an’ as sooin as shoo saw Jack shoo rested her neives on her huggens, an lukkin at him throo heead to fooit sed, “What’s ta been doin nah; can’t ta stur withaat gettin into a scrape?”

“Well it seems net, for if aw dooant get into a mess misen, ther’s somdy gets me into one.”

“Tha’ll keep me dryin cloas for thee, aw can see that; but goa upstairs an’ put on thi own duds, an’ awl see if aw can fettle them up at tha has on.”

“Awm sooary to give yo soa mich trouble, but then it mud ha been war, if awd gooan daan an’ niver come up.”

“Tha’d ha been noa loss, lad, tha needn’t think; but luk as sharp as tha con, for aw’ve begun to get th’ teah ready.”

“Awl net be long,” he sed, an’ wol he wor changin his clooas th’ uncle tell’d her all ’at had happen’d, on shoo laff’d wol her face wor as red as a turkey cock.

When Jack coom daan th’ table wor set an’ all ready for th’ teah, an’ th’ uncle an’ hont had takken ther places at th’ table.

“Come sit thi daan,” sed his hont; “but before tha does, just hand me th’ tea pot off th’ rib; an’ mind, for th’ hanel’s hot.”