I began to grow anxious again, for I recalled the past careless methods of Phaeton, and I had no wish to go looping the loop through the empyrean with one of his known adventurous disposition, to be hurled unceremoniously sooner or later perhaps into the sun itself.

“Perhaps we’d better leave it until some other day,” I ventured, timidly.

“No time like the present,” Jason retorted.  “Only hang on to yourself.  All ready, Phaety!”

The chauffeur grasped the lever, and, turning it swiftly to one side, there in the blue vault of heaven, a thousand miles from anywhere, that machine began executing the most remarkable flip-flaps the mind of man ever conceived.  Not once or twice, but a hundred times did we go whirling round and round through the skies, until finally I got so that I could not tell if I were right side up or upside down.  It was great sport, however, and but for the fact that on the third trial I lost my grip and would have fallen head over heels through space had not Mercury, who was flying alongside of the machine, swooped down and caught me by the leg as I fell out, I found it as exhilarating as it was novel.  I could have kept it up forever, had we not shortly hove in sight of the links, which, as I have already told you, were located on the planet Mars; and such gorgeousness as I there encountered was unparalleled on earth.  Much that we earth-folk have wondered at became clear at once.  The great canals, as we call them, for instance, turned out to be vast sand-bunkers that glistened like broad rivers of silver in the wondrous sheen of the planet, while the dark greenish spots, concerning which our astronomers have speculated so variously, were nothing more nor less than putting-greens.  It is extraordinary that until my visit to the planet as the guest of Jupiter, this perfectly simple solution of the various Martian problems was not even guessed.

As we drew up at the pretty little club-house, Jupiter emerged from the door and greeted me cordially.  My eyes fell before his smiling gaze, for I must confess I was mighty shamefaced over my experience of the morning, but his manner restored my self-possession.  It was very genial and forgiving.

“Glad to see you again,” he said.  “If you play golf as well as you do synonyms you’re a scratch man.  You didn’t foozle a syllable.”

“I should have, had I known as much as I do now,” said I.

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t know,” Jupiter returned majestically, “for I can use that word stult in my business.  Now suppose we have a bit of luncheon and then start out.”

After eating sparingly we began our game.  I was provided with a caddie that looked like one of Raphael’s angels, and Jupiter himself handed me a driver from his own bag.

“You’ll have to be careful how you use it,” he said; “it has properties which may astonish you.”

I teed up my ball, swung back, and then with all the vigor at my command whacked the ball square and true.  It sprang from the tee like a bird let loose and flew beyond my vision, and while I was trying with my eye to keep up with it in its flight, I received a stinging blow on the back of my head which felled me to the ground.