Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,359 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete.
fact, for a moment suspect a Queen, or even a Duchess, of such bad taste; for, as far as our experience goes, we have generally found that women do not cast their affections to men who are sheepish, insensible, cold, ungainly, with small voices, and not more than five feet high.  Surprise artfully excited and cleverly satisfied is the grand aim of the dramatist.  How completely is it here fulfilled! for when we discover that the personator of Henrico is meant for an Adonis, we are astonished.

The truth is then, that the secret benefactor of this supposed-to-be irresistible youth has always been the Duchess Albafurez, who, learning from Ollivarez that her pet has new claims upon her heart for having killed her friend the Duke, determines to assist him to escape, which however is not at all necessary, for Ollivarez is entrusted with the warrant for apprehending the person or persons unknown who did the murder.  But could he injure the man who has made him a Duke by a lucky coup-d’epee?  No, no.  Let him cross the frontier; and, when he is out of reach, what thundering denunciations will not the possessor of the dukedom fulminate against the killer of his cousin!  It is shocking to perceive how intimately acquainted old Scribe must be with manners, customs, and feelings, as they exist at Court.

The necessary passports are placed before the Queen for her signature (perhaps her Spanish Majesty can’t afford clerks); but when she perceives whom they threaten to banish from behind her chair, she declines honouring them with her autograph.  The Duchess thus learns her secret.  “She, too, love Henrico?  Well I never!” About this time a tornado of jealousy may be expected; but court etiquette prevents it from bursting; and the Duchess reserves her revenge, the Queen sits down to her embroidery frame, and one is puzzled to know what is coming next.

This puzzle was not on Monday night long in being resolved. Ollivarez entered, and a child in the gallery commenced crying with that persevering quality of tone which threatens long endurance.  Mr. Yates could not resist the temptation; and Ollivarez, the newly-created Duke of Medina, promised the baby a free admission for four, any other night, if it would only vacate the gallery just then.  These terms having been assented to by a final screech, the infant left the gallery.  After an instant’s pause—­during which the Manager tapped his forehead, as much as to say, “Where did I leave off?”—­the piece went on.

We had no idea till last night how difficult it was for a Queen to indulge in a bit of flirtation!  A most elaborate intrigue is, it seems, necessary to procure for her a tender interview with her innamorato.  A plan was invented, whose intricacy would have bothered the inventor of spinning-jennies, whereby Henrico was to be closeted with her most Christian Majesty,—­its grand accomplishment to take place when the Queen

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 1, Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.