The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 75, January, 1864 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 341 pages of information about The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 75, January, 1864.

The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 75, January, 1864 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 341 pages of information about The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 75, January, 1864.
yesterday evening, expatiating to my wife on the surprising cheapness of her point-lace set,—­“Got for just nothing at all, my dear!” and a circle of admiring listeners echoes the sound.  “Did you ever hear anything like it?  I never heard of such a thing in my life”; and away sails Mrs. Croesus as if she had a collar composed of all the cardinal virtues.  In fact, she is buoyed up with a secret sense of merit, so that her satin slippers scarcely touch the carpet.  Even I myself am fond of showing a first edition of “Paradise Lost,” for which I gave a shilling in a London book-stall, and stating that I would not take a hundred dollars for it.  Even I must confess there are points on which I am mortal.

But all this while my wife sits on her roll of carpet, looking into my face for approbation, and Marianne and Jane are pouring into my ear a running-fire of “How sweet!  How lovely!  Just like that one of Mrs. Tweedleum’s!”

“And she gave two dollars and seventy-five cents a yard for hers, and this is”—­

My wife here put her hand to her mouth, and pronounced the incredible sum in a whisper, with a species of sacred awe, common, as I have observed, to females in such interesting crises.  In fact, Mr. Ketchem, standing smiling and amiable by, remarked to me that really he hoped Mrs. Crowfield would not name generally what she gave for the article, for positively it was so far below the usual rate of prices that he might give offence to other customers; but this was the very last of the pattern, and they were anxious to close off the old stock, and we had always traded with them, and he had a great respect for my wife’s father, who had always traded with their firm, and so, when there were any little bargains to be thrown in any one’s way, why, he naturally, of course—­And here Mr. Ketchem bowed gracefully over the yardstick to my wife, and I consented.

Yes, I consented; but whenever I think of myself at that moment, I always am reminded, in a small way, of Adam taking the apple; and my wife, seated on that roll of carpet, has more than once suggested to my mind the classic image of Pandora opening her unlucky box.  In fact, from the moment I had blandly assented to Mr. Ketchem’s remarks, and said to my wife, with a gentle air of dignity, “Well, my dear, since it suits you, I think you had better take it,” there came a load on my prophetic soul, which not all the fluttering and chattering of my delighted girls and the more placid complacency of my wife could entirely dissipate.  I presaged, I know not what, of coming woe; and all I presaged came to pass.

In order to know just what came to pass, I must give you a view of the house and home into which this carpet was introduced.

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The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 13, No. 75, January, 1864 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.