an’ hoo potter’t an’ rooted abeawt,
tryin’ these keys; till hoo fund one that fitted
at th’ side, an’ hoo twirled it round
an’ round till hoo’d wund it up; an’
then,—yo may guess how capt they wur, when
it started a-playin’ a tune. ‘Hello?’
said Robin. ’A psaum-tune, bith mass!
A psaum-tune eawt ov a weshin’-machine!
Heaw’s that?’ An’ he star’t
like a throttled cat. ‘Nay,’ said
Mary, ’I cannot tell what to make o’ this!’
Th’ owd woman wur theer, an’ hoo said,
’Mary; Mary, my lass, thou ‘s gone an’
spoilt it,—the very first thing, theaw
has. Theaw’s bin tryin’ th’
wrong keigh, mon; thou has, for sure.’
Then Mary turned to Robin, an’ hoo said, ’Whatever
sort of a machine’s this, Robin?’ ‘Nay,’
said Robin, ’I dunnot know, beawt it’s
one o’ thoose at’s bin made for weshin’
surplices.’ But Robin begun a-smellin’
a rat; an’, as he didn’t want to ha’
to tak it back th’ same neet, he pike’t
off out at th’ dur, while they wur hearkenin’
th’ music; an’ he drove whoam as fast
as he could goo. In a minute or two th’
little lass went dancin’ into th’ parlour
to owd Isaac an’ hoo cried out, ‘Father,
you must come here this minute! Th’ weshin’-machine’s
playin’ th’ Owd Hundred!’ ‘It’s
what?’ cried Isaac, layin’ his pipe down.
‘It’s playin’ th’ Owd Hundred!
It is, for sure! Oh, it’s beautiful!
Come on!’ An’ hoo tugged at his lap to
get him into th’ wesh-house. Then th’
owd woman coom in, and hoo said, ’Isaac, whatever
i’ the name o’ fortin’ hasto bin
blunderin’ and doin’ again? Come thi
ways an’ look at this machine thae’s brought
us. It caps me if yean yowling divle’ll
do ony weshin’. Thae surely doesn’t
want to ha’ thi shirt set to music, doesto?
We’n noise enough i’ this hole beawt yon
startin’ or skrikin’. Thae’ll
ha’ th’ house full o’ fiddlers an’
doancers in a bit.’ ‘Well, well,’
said Isaac, ’aw never yerd sich a tale i’
my life! Yo’n bother’t me a good while
about a piano; but if we’n getten a weshin’-machine
that plays church music, we’re set up, wi’
a rattle! But aw’ll come an’ look
at it.’ An’ away he went to th’
wesh-house, wi’ th’ little lass pooin’
at him, like a kitlin’ drawin’ a stone-cart.
Th’ owd woman followed him, grumblin’ o’
th’ road,—’Isaac, this is what
comes on tho stoppin’ so lat’ i’th
town of a neet. There’s olez some blunderin’
job or another. Aw lippen on tho happenin’
a sayrious mischoance, some o’ these neets.
I towd tho mony a time. But thae tays no moor
notis o’ me nor if aw ’re a milestone,
or a turmit, or summat. A mon o’ thy years
should have a bit o’ sense.’
“‘Well, well,’ said Isaac, hobblin’ off, ’do howd thi din, lass! I’ll go an’ see what ails it. There’s olez summat to keep one’s spirits up, as Ab o’ Slender’s said when he broke his leg.’ But as soon as Isaac see’d th’ weshin’-machine, he brast eawt a-laughin’, an’ he sed: ’Hello! Why, this is th’ church organ! Who’s brought it?’ ‘Robin o’ Sceawter’s.’ ‘It’s just like him. Where’s th’ maunderin’ foo gone to?’ ’He’s off whoam.’


