Joanna Godden eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 448 pages of information about Joanna Godden.

Joanna Godden eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 448 pages of information about Joanna Godden.

“I think it’s horrible of you—­perfectly horrible.  I’d absolutely no idea you were that sort of woman—­I thought at least you were decent and respectable....  A man you were engaged to, too.  Oh, I know what you’re thinking—­you’re thinking I’m in the same boat as you are, but I tell you I’m not.  I was a married woman—­I couldn’t have married my lover, I’d a right to take what I could get.  But you could have married yours—­you were going to marry him.  But you lost your head—­like a common servant—­like the girl you sacked years ago when you thought I was too young to understand anything about it.  And I never landed myself with a child—­at least there was some possibility of wiping out what I’d done when it proved a mistake, some chance of living it down—­and I’ve done it, I’ve won my way back, and now you come along and disgrace me all over again, and the man I love ...”

Never had Ellen’s voice been so like Joanna’s.  It had risen to a hoarse note where it hung suspended—­anyone now would know that they were sisters.

“I tell you I’m sorry, Ellen.  But I can’t do nothing bout it.”

“Yes, you can.  You can marry this man, Hill—­then no one need ever know, Tip need never know—­”

“Reckon that wouldn’t keep them from knowing.  They’d see as I was getting married in a hurry—­not an invitation out and my troossoo not half ready—­and then they’d count the months till the baby came.  No, I tell you, it’ll be much better if I go away.  Everyone ull think as I’m bust, through having lost my case, and I’ll go right away—­Chichester, I’d thought of going to, where Martha Relf is—­and when the baby comes, no one till be a bit the wiser.”

“Of course they will.  They’ll know all about it—­everything gets known here, and you’ve never in your life been able to keep a secret.  If you marry, people won’t talk in the same way—­it’ll be only guessing, anyhow.  You needn’t be down here when the baby’s born—­and at least Tip needn’t know.  Joanna, if you love me, if you ever loved me, you’ll send a wire to this man and tell him that you’ve changed your mind and must see him—­you can easily make up the quarrel, whatever it was.”

“Maybe he wouldn’t marry me now, even if I did wire.”

“Nonsense—­he’d have to.”

“Well, he won’t be asked.”

Joanna was stiffening with grief.  She had not expected to have this battle with Ellen; she had been prepared for abuse and upbraiding, but not for argument—­it had not struck her that her sister would demand the rehabilitation she herself refused.

“You’re perfectly shameless,” sobbed Ellen.  “My God!  It ud take a woman like you to brazen through a thing like this.  Swanking, swaggering, you’ve always been ... well, I bet you’ll find this too much even for your swagger—­you don’t know what you’re letting yourself in for....  I can tell you a little, for I’ve known, I’ve felt, what people can be....  I’ve had to face them—­when you wouldn’t let Arthur give me my divorce.”

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Project Gutenberg
Joanna Godden from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.