Hugh’s thoughts went back, like the clouds, towards that tiny spring of passion in his own life.  He felt that he could have forgiven it—­and himself—­if he had been swept into the vortex of a headlong mountain torrent leaping down its own wild water-way, carrying all before it.  Other men he had seen who had been wrested off their feet, swept out of their own keeping by such a torrent on the steep hill-side of their youth.  But it had not been so with him.  He had walked more cautiously than they.  As he walked he had stopped to look at the little thread of water which came bubbling up out of its white pebbles.  It was so pretty, it was so feeble, it was so clear.  Involuntarily he followed it, watched it grow, amused himself, half contemptuously, with it, helped its course by turning obstacles from its path.  It never rushed.  It never leaped.  It was a toy.  The day came when it spread itself safe and shallow on level land, and he embarked upon it.  But he was quickly tired of it.  It was beginning to run muddily through a commonplace country, past squalid polluting towns and villages.  The hills were long since gone.  He turned to row to the shore.  And, behold, his oars were gone!  He had been trapped to his destruction.

Hugh had never regarded seriously his intrigue with Lady Newhaven.  He had been attracted, excited, partially, half-willingly enslaved.  He had thought at the time that he loved her, and that supposition had confirmed him in his cheap cynicism about woman.  This, then, was her paltry little court, where man offered mock homage, and where she played at being queen.  Hugh had made the discovery that love was a much overrated passion.  He had always supposed so; but when he tired of Lady Newhaven he was sure of it.  His experience was, after all, only the same as that which many men acquire by marriage, and hold unshaken through long and useful lives.  But Hugh had not been able to keep the treasures of this early experience.  It had been rendered worthless, perhaps rather contemptible by a later one—­that of falling in love with Rachel, and the astonishing discovery that he was in love for the first time.  He had sold his birthright for a mess of red pottage, as surely as any man or woman who marries for money or liking.  He had not believed in his birthright, and holding it to be worthless, had given it to the first person who had offered him anything in exchange.

His whole soul had gradually hardened itself against Lady Newhaven.  If he had loved her, he said to himself, he could have borne his fate.  But the play had not been worth the candle.  His position was damnable; but that he could have borne—­at least, so he thought if he had had his day.  But he had not had it.  That thought rankled.  To be hounded out of life because he had mistaken paper money for real was not only unfair, it was grotesque.

Gradually, however, Hugh forgot his smouldering hate of Lady Newhaven, his sense of injustice and anger against fate; he forgot everything in his love for Rachel.  It became the only reality of his life.