Den Ole Man Crow up en sez, sezee, “You been runnin’ roun’ a long time, en a-sassin’ atter me; But I speck you done come to de end er de row.  You wun’t frighten me not wuth a cent.,” sez Ole Man Crow.  “I ain’t gwine nowhere skasely; I’ll be busy near dis rail.  You wun’t tempt me wid de butter—­or der powder—­on yo’ tail.  Good-bye, Brer Fox, take keer yo’ cloze, For dis is de way de worril goes; Some goes up en some goes down. You’ll get ter de bottom all safe en soun’!  I’ll watch yo’ ‘strategy’ wid int’rest, now en den, En—­well, I’ll try ter look, des as frightened as I ken!”

* * * * *

The House of Lords Committee of Privileges decided that Captain FORESTER’s action in the Barnard Peerage case was a Vane attempt.  “The chance,” said the Times, “of such a prize as Raby Castle, with L60,000 a-year, is likely to tempt a man to think his arguments and claims are better than they really are.”  Raby Castle on the brain would soon become a sort of Rabies.

* * * * *

HAMLET IN HALF AN HOUR.

(PREPARED FOR THE HALLS IN COMPLIANCE WITH THE SUGGESTIONS OF MR. PLUNKET’S COMMITTEE.)

    SCENE—­An open space outside Elsinore.  View of the Palace and
    the Battlements.  HAMLET discovered talking to the Ghost.

Ham. And is it really within thy power to show me illustrations to the story that has so much interested me?

Ghost. It is!  Behold!

    [He waves his baton and a rock becomes transparent,
    displaying a tableau of the play-scene in “Hamlet."]

Ham. Ah, how well do I remember the occasion!  It was after I had met thee, and thou hadst told me the sad story of thy decease by my Uncle.  And then I contrived this device to catch the conscience of the King!  Thou art sleeping calmly, and a cloaked figure is pouring poison—­real poison—­into thy ear! and look, the King is greatly disturbed!  Ah, how it all comes back to me! (The rock resumes its normal condition.) And canst thou show me more?

Ghost. Ay, and I will!  Behold!

    [He waves his baton, and another rock discovers a tableau
    representing the Burial of OPHELIA.

Ham. (deeply interested).  Why, these must be the maimed rites that were all that was given to my poor lost love—­the lady I desired to visit a nunnery—­to OPHELIA.  And see there are the comic Grave-diggers.  Show me more.  Show me more!

    [The vision fades away like its predecessor.

Ghost. I would, did not the decision of statute law limit the time.  And now I must away.  But mind, my son—­six principal characters, and no more!  Thou wilt remember!

Ham. Ay, marry; and yes, I will! (The Ghost disappears.) And so I have to meet LAERTES at a fencing-bout.  I will!