“The Government,” he says, “if only with the instincts of self-preservation, should hasten the Dissolution.  If they go on a little longer, no saying what they may come to, with JOE as their principal champion in town and country, with JOHN REDMOND as their favourite orator; led into the Lobby the other day by BURT against the Eight Hours Bill, they only want to recruit CUNINGHAME GRAHAM to their ranks to make the medley complete.  If they go on another three months, we shall see them some Sunday following CUNINGHAME GRAHAM’S red flag as he leads them to Trafalgar Square, there to be addressed by Alderman JOHN BURNS.”

Business done.—­Got into Committee on Civil Service Estimates.

[Illustration:  “Crude and wasteful.”]

Thursday.—­Scotch Members made a night of it.  Great muster of the Clans.  Government have L265,000 to make over to Scotland in relief of Local Taxation and promotion of Education.  Scotch Members don’t object to the money, but take exception to its plan of distribution.  Member after Member rises from Opposition Benches, biting at hand that proffers the boon.  “Crude and wasteful,” BUCHANAN calls this scheme, and Scotch Members lustily cheer.

A capital debate of its kind, but not picturesque; Benches empty, only the LORD-ADVOCATE on the Treasury Bench.

“I’ll tell you how you can manage these fellows, my dear CASABLANCA,” said JEMMY LOWTHER, crossing the Gangway, and seating himself for a moment by the solitary Minister.

“Beg your pardon, my name is PEARSON.”

“Of course,” said JEMMY, “I know very well; only a quotation; thinking of the Boy who stood on the burning deck, whence all but he had fled, doncha.  Was going to tell you how you can get out of this trouble.  Fellows opposite righteously indignant at your proposed disposition of money.  Very well; you get up, say you’re sorry to have offended; had no idea you’d made such a mistake; only atonement you can offer is to withdraw the proposed grant altogether.  Then you’ll see how they’ll sit up.”

“Excellent idea,” said LORD-ADVOCATE.  “Shall mention it to GOSCHEN when he comes back—­if he ever does,” he added with weary voice, looking down the deserted Bench.  Scotch Members, all unconscious of JEMMY LOWTHER’S machination, went on talking till midnight, when debate stood adjourned.

Business done.—­None.

Friday.—­In Committee of Supply; SAGE OF QUEEN ANNE’S GATE thinks opportunity favourable for Prince ARTHUR to tell all he knows about Dissolution.  Prince ARTHUR quite agreeable, but really knows nothing.  Radicals look angry at being thus put off; show signs of intention to discuss the matter.  Mr. G. interposes; makes one of his bland speeches; wouldn’t press question now (a suggestion that pleases Ministers); by-and-by time will come, then we shall see; whereat SAGE and his friends brighten up; Mr. G. sits down having pleased everybody; storm blown off.